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About Michael Fackerell

The Christian faith is about Jesus. He came to save the lost. About Jesus Christ, Bible teaching, Testimonies, Salvation, Prayer, Faith, Networking.


  1. EVANGELIST KUNAL MUKHERJEE was born of staunch Hindu Brahmin parent in West Bengal (India) in 1952. From his very childhood, he developed a tremendous curiosity to know God and the Supernatural power. For that purpose from an early age he started visiting many places of pilgrimage. He met many saints, monks, and priests of different religions. In course of time, he himself began to practice occultism, black magic and mysticism rigorously. Had developed an undebatable faith in astrology, & palmistry. Finally, as per advice of a friend, he accepted a guru (mentor) at Rishikesh (Uttaranchal, India) at the age of thirty nine. He had even fled home three times to take Sanyas.

    His life was not consistent. He also developed a very bad habit of drinking. Even had visited wrong places at times. In between, in Nov.’81 he met Mala and got married to her after sometime without any proper preparation. This gesture made his parents displeased and he had to be kept away from them for long. His first son KUSHAL was born in 1984 followed by the second and last one , KUNTAL in 1986. His financial condition became quite erratic as he could not continue with one job for long. He and Mala with two little children literally started fighting against all odds to make their both ends meet. They went into heavy debts. Kunal’s drinking habits increased. He tried many things for survival. More and more they started resorting to all kinds of magic and charms with strong desire to come out of those situations. On 30th May 1994, being totally dejected of life, Kunal decided to commit suicide. As he went to a Mumbai Park to prepare his heart for that ultimate step (as per his religious faith, he wanted to have a second birth); he met somebody who was seated in one corner of that park with a Bible. He had never seen a Bible before. His impression about Bible was that it was a book which only the Christians should read. So, when he came to know that the other person was also of the same religious faith as he was, he was utterly surprised. But, when that man told him that Bible would give PEACE, Kunal got really carried away. He had been looking for ‘Peace’ for so many years. As per the suggestion of that person, he went to see Late Mr. Terry Athaide (an Evangelist) the next (31st May) evening. They had long discussions. But Kunal was not ready to change his parental religion and accept Jesus. He wanted Brother Terry to perform a miracle for him (kunal) and help him come out of the problems so that he could get peace and would lead a good life thereafter. That was the main reason of his visiting Brother Terry. To Kunal that day, Jesus was just another religious preacher, who might have had some miracle working power. But never a God. By no means. For him, no god or goddess could be higher or greater or more powerful than his gods, goddesses or guru.

    Eventually, at the request of Brother Terry, Kunal allowed him to make a fast prayer.

    Halleluiah! At that appointed moment (Isaiah 49:8) , the eternal Savior by the power of His shed-blood (Hebrews 9:22), and of the Holy Ghost (Titus 3:5) performed the WORK OF SALVATION in the life of that bonded Hindu Brahmin, a deadly drunkard, a staunch black-magician, an unfaithful husband, a cruel father and all that he was. Kunal experienced the love of JESUS CHRIST the MESSAIAH Who forgave all his iniquities right then as he confessed them. Kunal became ready to confess that Jesus died, was buried and resurrected for him and is alive forever more. Immediately, the powerful Word of God, from John 10:9 charged him up to be totally convicted that HE COULD FIND THE NEW PASTURE OF HIS LIFE, AS HE ENTERED BY THE GATE OF JESUS CHRIST AND HE WAS SAVED. Hallelluyah !


    The Joy of Salvation exulted him. He ran to give good news of that unique experience to his wife. But, she was never happy. She did not like her husband to become a Christian. Many pleadings of Kunal went to her deaf ears. She was adamant to split. But, as the days passed by, there were many changes being noticed in Kunal. Situations at home were also changing for the better. She used to appreciate them even acknowledged that it all happened due to Jesus. But she very firmly decided to remain faithful to her ‘OWN RELIGION’.

    On 16th July, in the evening when Brother Terry and sister Maria(Late Terry’s wife) visited them and began praying over Mala, the evil spirit in her (Mala) started manifesting and within no time she was set free. Praise the Lord ! Mala too accepted Jesus as her personal Savior that evening.



    “Who hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the kingdom of His dear Son; in Who we have redemption through His blood, even the forgiveness of sins.” Colossians 1: 13,14

    Evangelist Kunal and family started experiencing the awesome love of Jesus in various ways. Things in life changed outright. Kunal got a big job. They came to another place from Mumbai. Name, fame, money, status in the world were just with them. Spiritually also they were growing very strong. Many around that place were changing their lives by the testimonies of Kunal and Mala. They committed their lives for the Lord.

    But slowly Kunal started backsliding. Eventually, as the chastisement of God severely fell upon Kunal, they had to leave that place with NOTHING. No job. Children had to discontinue their studies. Mala got into a deadly disease. They came to Bangalore, where they had nobody known. Over and above, the enemies from the previous place were chasing them frantically. During this time, Kunal and Mala started experiencing the LOVE OF GOD, HIS PROTECTIONS IN THE TEETH OF TOSSING WAVES OF LIFE, HIS CARE, HIS CONCERNS FOR HIS LOVED ONES. The hand of Lord their God was always upon Kunal and his family ( Ezra 7:6b). After a year and a half of traumatic experience of wideness suffering Kunal and family could see the Red-sea divided. Kunal again got a job. This time it was much greater than before. Everything started changing for the better. By now both their children also accepted Jesus as the Lord of their lives and took Baptisms of Water. But Mala’s health was gradually declining. Doctors declared that there was no cure of that disease (VASCULITIS—TOTAL IMMUNE SYSYTEM GOT DEFUNCT). After sometime, Kunal came to Hyderabad on another assignment. His family also came with him. Mala’s condition worsened at Hyderabad. She developed an additional complication of ‘NON-STOP BLEEDING’. All lost hope in Mala. Their elder son, Kushal had to forego his one-year of academic session as Kunal was posted outside Hyderabad and Kushal was the only one to look after Mala. Finally, the doctors wanted to conduct a surgery on Mala for which Kunal had to be present. The employers refused to give Kunal leave. He decided to resign and stand by his wife during operation.

    As they were preparing for Mala’s admission into the hospital for the surgery, God worked a mighty miracle in Mala. ONEDAY THROUGH A CHRISTIAN TELEVISION CHANNEL AS A SERVANT OF GOD WAS PRAYING , HE SPOKE ABOUT ‘A SISTER WATCHING THAT PROGRAMME, PROFUSELY BLEEDING’. Praise the Lord! Mala was miraculously healed.

    As Mala started fast recovering, Kunal wanted to adopt some means of livelihood. He started thinking of setting-up a manufacturing unit. But, none of his attempts was successful.

    On 13th September, 2002, as Kunal being totally nonplussed and not knowing what exactly was his destiny, decided to tarry in HIS presence, he heard the CALLING of the Lord to be an. EVANGELIST (II TIM.4:5). Utterly confused, as he was, he waited upon the Lord.

    In January 2003, Kunal was invited by CBN INTERNATIONAL to join them as an ordinary TELE-COUNSELLOR. A few weeks later, Kunal and Mala’s life-changing testimonies were recorded by CBN INTERNETIONAL. As the days passed by, Kunal was promoted to one of the senior most positions in CBN INTERNATIONAL INDIA.. As Kunal was getting complacent with his responsibilities at CBN, suddenly God directed him to quit CBN and come out completely as an indigenous worker of the Lord. Confused beyond measure , Kunal tried to reason out many points to the contrary. But like a disgruntled Jonah, Kunal was thrown into the boisterous ocean of ostensible uncertainty. Totally baffled, Kunal “offered up prayers and supplications with vehement cries and tears to Him and …..was heard…” (Heb.5 :7).


    Today, Kunal uncompromisingly carries out the mandate of Great Commission around the world (Mark 16:15-18 & Acts. 1:8) in order to pay heed to the MINISTRY which he has received in the Lord, that he may fulfill it ( Col. 4:17). Mala, (a woman, gifted with the Spirit of vision, discernment and travailing) supports her husband with persistent intercessions. Even two young sons – KUSHAL & KUNTAL stand steadfast in every possible way.



  2. edgar g. mayor says:

    Here Sirs/Madames;

    a) Gives glory to Jesus Chris, our God and Father
    b) Shares with your and your readers, my life’s testimony of God’ grace


    By: Edgar Guillermmo Mayor
    Re-written/Edited by Bro Norman Rasmussen

    This is my personal testimony of how as a child, I unknowingly was slowly changed by one self-destructive negative emotion after another. ANGER – this one emotion … that through the years … spawned other destructive emotions. It started our being surface anger, and then slowly began to turn into rage. Then from rage into fury, and fury into a death wish.

    How did that all happen? Bottled up anger will drive a person to self-destruction, one way or another. Not only will it kill you … one way or another … but it can be the GREATEST hindrance inside us from discovering God … and experiencing peace and joy with Him, and discovering our purpose for our being created in the first place.

    Thus, this is also my personal testimony of how God shed His wonderful grace upon me, and delivered me from the many prisons I had inside me that all came from bottling up my anger … so it is a testimony of HOPE for anyone else who can identify with the prisons I had inside me, and may even be contemplating killing someone they are angry with right now … or killing themselves.

    God never created us to be vessels of anger – not for very long, anyway. Anger is a normal emotion God gave us, but we must come to learn how deadly it can become. There is an unseen evil force in the world that takes great personal pleasure in helping instill anger in everyone he can, especially those who desire to know God the most, because if he can help get us angry and keep us angry, he knows it will most likely keep us angry at God. Being angry at God will short circuit our ability to get to know God, which then enables us to flow WITH God, instead of against God. This evil presence is angry at God because he will never have the opportunity to be at peace with God ever again. He once had peace with God – a long, long time ago, and experienced joyous glories that we can’t imagine. Yet he chose to rebel against his Creator and our Creator, and was sentenced to this planet, temporarily.

    The Bible clearly and bluntly tells us this in Ephesians 4:26: Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.

    You may not believe right now there is a devil that delights in keeping you angry, but I can assure you, if you remain angry for very long, you will lock yourself up in a self-made prison, and sadly … never even realize you were IN a prison. If you’ll take the time to read my testimony, I’ll help you see how God let me out of my self-imposed prisons, and by God’s grace, trust God to use my testimony to point you to the way to get OUT of your prison of misery.

    I feel to start out by saying some hard but critically important words of wisdom to fathers and mothers:

    PARENTS – Don’t let these words become your child’s heart cry: “I am so tired – so messed up inside. I want to give up – I just want to die!”

    I was one of those grownup children. I was so hurting inside that suicide seemed to be the only option left for me. But it was not. Not at all. God never gave any of us a chance to live to just end our lives by trying to destroy it through suicide, just because we are miserable in life, though I surely didn’t know it at that time in my life. Millions of lives have been changed over time when people gave the mess of their life to God … and let him resurrect that mess into one glorious message of praise to Him, such as what I am doing by writing out my testimony.

    I feel impressed to share the mess I was … and share the glorious message I now have to share with others … to be used of God to give other’s hope and direction, so their life will begin to count for something of eternal significance. Surely YOU want your life to count for something of eternal significance, don’t you? Please, then, do yourself a huge favor and read what I have to share.

    I was born on the 8th of June, 1950, thus I am 58 years old as of this writing (2008). To describe it very briefly here, my testimony is initially one of hopelessness and of being in many prison cells — even the ones that have the most devastating effect in one’s life, but that such cells do not easily come to the minds of most people. But here they will be explained.

    So – I came face to face with only two options in my mind: Either that I would commit suicide, or surrender to God.

    Some desperate people don’t see it quite that way. Some people deicide they are going to commit suicide, and take their chances with God in the next life. Not wise. Eternally unwise, in fact!

    But let’s start from the beginning. I was told that I was separated from my parents at the age of two months. I was raised by my grandparents. Thus, I did not have the benefit of being adequately nourished by my mother’s milk. Perhaps such was the reason why as a child, I was very, very sickly.

    But God is a great balancer; He gave me a keen mind. Even my employers had to admit that my real strength lies in my analytical mind, so they said. At work, I seemed to be okay, but no one knew what I had in the inside. I was raging with anger, yet I was slowly dying also inside.

    My sport, which was Shutokan karate, was one of my outlets for stress. On the bad side however, I became one of the most feared fighters/instructors in all of Japan Karate Association, Philippine Chapter, for I vented all the rage within me in that martial art and I truly became good at it, so they say, that at one time prior to a national tournament competition, I was told that my first match would be so easy for me that my opponent decided to embrace shame and went home before the start of the tournament, rather than face me in battle. It must have been very humiliating for him, but I could not have care less. I had no feeling of compassion at all. I just simply liked playing tough at every twist and turn possible and no one could reach me nor break me.

    My karate, which was supposed to be a way of perfecting character – a way of discipline and restraint and builder of respect for others – could not even help me one bit. I was so hopelessly one-track-minded … and so lost. I was buoyed up though my accomplishments – like my last exposure to international goodwill competition. I could still win the “Best Karate Player” medal, coming from a sabbatical of three to four years.

    But see this: I did not realize then that my medal was at the great sacrifice of my opponent – who towards the end of our match – could hardly lift up his left arm to defend himself. I hit him several times at the left ribcage, which he then just resigned to be beaten and broken. Good thing I did not break any of his ribs.

    At this point you might ask, “So, where were the truly devastating big problems in your life?” I’d answer you, “They were deep down inside of me.”

    Now, here are some of the details. My mother was an only child and by our country’s standards, came from a wealthy family. But the reverse is true with my father. I was given to my grandparents as a peace offering to those who were against such marriage between my father and mother. And more than that, I was born into the biggest clan in our town that almost 60% of the total population belonged to my clan. In time, at the death of my grandfather, I would be their leader. And my grandfather, sitting me in his white horse one time, made sure that our tenants knew that I was the “heir to the throne,” so to speak.

    In a “clannish” family situation, the first son is destined to take over the lead role in the clan. I was then destined to take that role, thus I was trained for it. Now, what my relatives did not know was that I was a full blown coward in contrast to the leaders of the clan who came before me. Their bravery preceded them. I say this for you to realize that what is expected of the leader of the clan is for him to lay down his own life if need be, if only to protect any one member of the clan from those who maim their lives.

    Before I continue, let me trace back to where I was still a child in the grade school, for there we would find the root cause of the inner rage within me.

    “Children Are Individually Unique. They Must Be Treated Accordingly.”

    So there I was, separated from my parents at an early age. By God’s grace though I had an inborn gift of sensitivity to things, and an analytical mind. On the negative side however, I had a temperament that was later on aggravated by the things I faced in life. But one thing that escaped my attention to details though was that I did not see that the gap between me and my parents was getting wider and wider as years passed. Most especially that I never heard them say, “I love you” nor ever experienced the affirmation of such verbal expression of love by way of a hug, nor ever received a gift from them on account of my grades and medals in school.

    I am sure that my parents loved me in a special way and that perhaps it was some difficult situations that prevented them to show their love and nearness to me. We only see from our own personal perspective. Often-times, if we could know the facts from our parent’s perspective, perhaps we would think differently about matters. But it takes parents to be honest and open and vulnerable about it, doesn’t it?

    At the age of 19, my grandfather died, and I just eased into the role of the leader of the clan. No fanfare – no nothing. Tradition just came alive. Thus, people naturally gravitated to me with their problems, even if it were only to tell on others of their misdeeds. It was thrilling at first, but when it became my routine and that I was losing my young and carefree adult life, I began to hate, resent and I eventually rebelled against it, though there was nothing I could to stop from playing my part. I had to continue, and thus it fueled continually my anger, rebellion and arrogance to the point that there was no more room to know and express the gentle emotions like love, compassion, kindness, mercy and the like. Consequently, the level of fear that I had, continued to rise. There was no escaping that.

    And all the more, I had to carry a shotgun to protect members of the clan, even my family – particularly my father – for in our part of the country, we were known to settle our disputes not in courts of law but by the point of a knife or a gun or with a hand grenade. And on top of that, I found myself alone fighting our battles. There was no one to team up with. It was fearful and awfully lonely.

    It came to a point that I even feared the ringing of the phone for fear that such was bringing another summon for me to pack up and go to battle once more. Day and night thus, I lived in fear. Fear that in one of the confrontations, I would get killed, or that I’d kill someone or several people.

    In essence then I was in prison. And the prison cell was called, “FEAR.” Fear was one of the most destructive emotions that I kept bottled up inside me, and it burned with growing intensity.

    As I continued to play my part in the clan, four other prison cells came into my life. One was named, “LONELINESS,” which at this point became more evident. Another was called, “YOUTH GANGS”. “EMOTIONAL BURDEN” was the calling of the other prison cell, and the fourth one was called, “BETRAYAL”.

    As with any young man, I also yearned for someone to love and to love me in return. Later on, I found a girlfriend in our home town, but there were some complications. She had problems with me. I did not know how to relate well in a love relationship. I did not know how. Oh my fate! I did not have a point of reference!

    Emotion-based prison cells are more devastating and painful than literal, physical prison cells. Such is what I have learned in all these experiences.

    My girlfriend’s problem with me was that I did not know how to behave in any kind of relationship in a mutual fulfilling way, much less in a love relationship. Plus it was compounded by the fact that I was not exactly what her family dreamt of as a son-in-law. We clung to each other in love though, even as a long distance relationship, yet in the end, her family succeeded in totally separating us. Thus I entered my prison cell of utter “LONELINESS”. I searched for things that would buoy me up and I ended up with one that I initially thought would give me love and acceptance – “YOUTH GANG MEMBERSHIP”.

    It did for a while, but then as I got deeper into the activities of the gang – which was more of gang dominance and warfare – my fears rose up to a higher level, for this time we were actually against authorities, and the wars were pretty serious. The gang I joined was one of the most notorious university gangs. I was in a state of great anxiety and confusion and fear, but remember – I was actually a full blown coward.

    And while all these were happening, things were also happening back home in the province. From the city, I went home to my province, for I was also taking charge of the affairs of the family/clan long distance during school months – instructing my parents to go back home to take care of the three old ladies who were left behind to fend for themselves when my grandfather died. They were already old. People – even relatives – had started to take advantage of our grandmother with her valuables, even the sale of some of our properties.

    Knowing that there would be some hesitance from my parents, given that my father was not well accepted, I told them that should they refuse to go back home. They went home anyway, and one day the inevitable happened. One of their “fights” caused the death of my mother.

    During the wake, while I was sitting alone in a lonely place, all of a sudden came my father in tears, and with a grieving voice told me that had it not been on my account, my mother would have been still alive.

    My father blamed me for the death of my mother. It was short of telling me that I killed my own mother. And this was how my prison cell called, “EMOTIONAL BURDEN” came into being.

    Then one December 25, at about 12 midnight – while everybody was awake and jolly and I tried to be one with them – my father came to me discreetly to tell me of some very bad, bad news. He had received news that the woman that I loved so dearly was already married and that she was then pregnant. WOW! A double whammy! The news sunk slowly in, but the pain was almost unbearable. It penetrated the very core of my being, and that is when I thought I came face-to-face for the first time, with my prison cell called, “BETRAYAL”.

    It should not amaze anyone, I am sure, that the next prison cell that came into my life to hold me prisoner like the rest was called, “ADDICTION”. It seems to follow “BETRAYAL” much of the time. So I drowned myself with gin, beer and women. Even at my workplace — then a middle management executive in one of top 10-15 Advertising Agency in the country — I fueled my addiction, for such vices were parts of the givens; parts of my work environment. Two big manifestations of my addiction to hard drinking were trembling hands when not “under the influence”, and nausea and feeling of weakness all over.

    Then as if the prison cells that bound me prisoner were not yet enough, the next prison cell I entered was, “DEATH WISH.” I was so messed up … my mind was in a whirl. I was so tired of holding on … I truly wanted to die.

    All it takes is one emotional problem unchecked in the life of a child to get him or her to the end of his rope, or spawn a chain of emotional baggage to eventually bring him down, if left unchecked.

    PARENTS: Please bear with me when I share this, for little children are so precious in the eyes and heart of God. For He says this in Matthew 19:14: But Jesus said, “Let the children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

    At this time of my life, you could find me beer-joint hopping almost every night, and my rage was getting out of control. At times I would be throwing beer bottles inside a beer house (and interestingly, no law enforcer ever confronted me at those times) even when at one time I tried to throw a bouncer of one beer joint down the stairs. In my deranged mind, I also had pulled the trigger twice on a man at point blank range.

    Another time – I was about to enter a beer house. There were these two rival gangs throwing beer bottles at each other and I just simply joining in the fray and when all were gone, I was still throwing beer bottles in the direction of the other gang. I never knew why I joined them. But today, I know why. I just simply wanted to die. My death wish was at the threshold of maturity. For then, I was in great fury!

    I Hated Myself – The World – God!

    I hated myself, the world and God! And I would seek the darkest streets to get home … hoping that there would be robbers or muggers lurking. Even while all alone, I would challenge gangs to a fight. One time — one group of addicts of about 8 to 10 responded with their kind of anger, and we had a beer bottle throwing incident at point blank range.

    When I saw a policeman, I would get so close behind him while saying in my mind, “If he would only touch my skin even lightly, I will kill him in two seconds flat with my martial arts technique.”

    Part of me wanted to die, but not yet to take my own life. I was looking for a reason, and one person or group to do it with seemed to be the best way.

    Then the Lord started to work in my life in a major way.

    I had to leave our old apartment house for another. I managed to settle in one townhouse where my next door neighbor was a single parent with two little boys: ages five and eight. I learned later on that the unit that I took was reserved for another, but for some reason, I ended up taking it – which was next to their apartment.

    A few weeks passed, and on Saturdays and Sundays where there would be no work, I would be with my gin or beer or brandy while watching TV. For some reason I could not explain … I simply would keep the door of my house open, and this was never my normal habit.

    One day the older boy of my next door single-parent-neighbor was also watching the TV with me. I was watching cartoons, of all TV shows! (I learned later that their TV was busted). So – I let him in and, and next came his five-year-old brother. This became our routine, until I began to want to come home early so that we could be together and watch TV together.

    This may be hard for some to understand, but I was so desperate for love and acceptance … I received from them love and acceptance, and much more. I saw myself – when I was still a child without my father – thru them. Had I been given the chance to marry my girlfriend, my children would have been at their age.

    In my wounded soul, I began to behave like a father to them and they responded well as if I were actually their father. Their mother went along with our fun. Then in one of our romping days, the older boy suddenly blurted out his question. He asked if I was courting their mother. Triggered by the question – for the first time in my mind – I saw their mother – who also very, very pretty – in a different light. She never existed before in my mind, for it was still set on my lost girlfriend.

    I answered, “What if you would find out that your mother wants me too? Would you allow me to marry her?”

    The boy simply answered, “Okay.”

    We continued our daily routine, but I began planning my move on their mother.

    Now here it gets interesting. The two boys would leave Bible tracts on my bed, or Our Daily Bread journal, and would teach me what they learned at Sunday school … and they were relentless! They would follow up on me, and persist in knowing if I read the tracts and Our Daily Bread or not. So I was forced to read the Bible tracts and Our Daily Bread for their joy and satisfaction.

    God Used Those Two Boys Mightily!

    The Bible tracts, and what these little boys of this single mother learned from Sunday school, were teaching me were setting God’s initial work inside me – to expose me to His Bible – to implant in me words of life.

    Up to that point in time, life made me very suspicious of people that I was not giving myself to. But, with these innocent little boys, I opened my heart … thus I became very, very vulnerable.

    God says in His Bible in 1 Corinthians 1:27: But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to shame the wise and God has chosen he weak things of the world to shame the things which are strong.”

    And how true God’s Word is, for he was using two little boys as His divine messengers, and I wasn’t even aware of it at the time!

    As time passed, I decided to have them as part of my family, which then launched me to court their mother. My approach fell flat on may face though. She was controlled by the Word of God. In 2 Corinthians 6:14 it says: “Do not be bound together with unbelievers…”.

    She was a Christian believer and I was not. She then withdrew the children to my great hurt. When I thought I found love and acceptance and solace – once more I got hurt. This time … it was the last straw.

    The option to commit suicide seemed then to be so ripe to pick … but then there was another option. In retrospect, God’s timing had been perfect (It Always IS!). God had made the preparations well, and this was the result of God’s ministering work on me through the children and the mother.

    From deep inside me, I found myself saying, “Lord – there are obviously only two options left for me to take now. The first one is suicide. The other option is to surrender my life to You. Now, Lord … I shall give You a chance at my life.”

    I did not know from days prior that when the single mother and the children had invited me to their worship center, God was showing me where to go if/when – at some future time – I would decide to try Him.

    I was the first one to arrive at the worship center. Nothing was happening during the first few minutes of the worship service, but deep down inside me there was a nagging feeling of surrender … but I did not know to what or to whom. I was still in a daze, like in an emotional fog of sorts.

    Then – all my senses came alive when the congregation began singing the song: “I surrender all… all to Jesus I surrender…”

    My Heart Was Bleeding Badly From Being Ravaged

    In my youth days, I was taught never to show weakness – especially tears in my eyes. This time – with a great lump in my throat – tears were freely flowing down my cheeks, and I was allowing it. No more pretenses. No more “Mr. Tough Guy.” I was now baring all — for all to see. I did not care. I was dead-tired of hiding. I just wanted to “live” a better life.

    As the song was being sung to its end, my whole life flashed before my eyes. I seemed to see the inside of my heart. It was bleeding very, very badly, and it was full of holes of pain. It was so torn up – messed up – so disfigured.

    And as I was seeing my ravaged emotional heart condition, I heard these words of comfort: “You can cry now. You are safe here. These are my people. You can now rest your head on my bosom.”

    Later on to come, I discovered those words were part of the essence of Jesus’ words in Matthew 11:28-30: “Come to Me all who are weary and heavy-laden and I will give you rest. Take My rest upon you and learn from Me for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and my load is light.”

    And so today, these are my salvation verses. I gave my life to Jesus Christ that day at the worship center. Today – even as of this writing – I confess to you that I still find difficulties in life – even temptations. But where before I was hopeless … today … in Christ, I have hope.

    I was in many prison cells. Yes – even the physical cell. I too had the experience of being thrown into a physical prison cell along with others who were also guilty as charged, but today, in Christ, I am free. I am free to admit it if I feel weak. I am free to cry if it seems to be the thing to do at the moment. If God cried, which He did the Bible says, then why should I be so embarrassed to cry? I am free to receive and appreciate God’s unconditional and acceptance of me, with all of my faults and character flaws. I am free to ask His forgiveness when I have blown it. I am free to receive His forgiveness because He promises me He will, in the Bible. I am free to tell others that they’ll never find true and lasting peace in one’s soul, until they have become spiritually born again in and through Christ Jesus my Lord. I am now free to be all that God created me for to be, even though much of my life on this planet is now behind me. I am free to turn the other cheek when wronged, rather than use my martial art skills to put fear in others, for I have leaned the secret of being truly strong. It is to be man enough to admit that I am weak, for when I admit that I am weak, God’s grace begins to flow through me, and I receive HIS strength for every occasion. It is through the strength of GOD now that I can do whatever He asks of me to do. The Apostle Paul learned that secret, where he wrote in 2 Corinthians 12:10: “For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

    It was on the 22 April of l990 that I got born again, and officially became FREE to commune with God any time I want, without fear that I won’t be accepted, loved, and taken care of by Him.

    We are all relational beings. The home is God’s ordained place where all of us must first learn how to relate with others in a healthy manner. And this must start at the very early stage of life.

    I say the above to parents, because it is so important. However, I realize there will be many reading this who would LOVE to be a parent, yet still haven’t even connected with the right person to even be married yet, or are people who have had divorce take its toll. I also realize there are younger people reading this who know of families that are stabile and parents each doing their part … when that is not the case in their own homes. But, it is never to late to learn, and help others God puts in your path to help have the family unit as the place God has given humanity for a child to be raised to be loved and accepted, disciplined when needed, and nurtured and encouraged in an atmosphere where Jesus Christ is put above all else. Not religion. Not just rules and regulations. A personal relationship with the living God. If children don’t see their parents talking with God from the heart, and truly desiring to please God, then the parents shouldn’t be surprised that there children won’t grow up to easily do those things either. Children don’t need to be told about God nearly as much as observing their parents have a meaningful relationship with God. When children see parents pray and prayers get answered, children NEVER forget that.

    Because it is indeed in the home that children must learn proper relationship with God and each other — especially love and acceptance, you can be almost certain of this: If they don’t find it at home, the world will give it to them … like the gang that I joined in. Dysfunctional children tend to hang around other dysfunctional children, because it is an atmosphere where acceptance is most easily found for most. Nothing much changes once a dysfunctional, emotionally scared child becomes an adult. They still tend to hang around other dysfunctional, emotionally scared adults, because that seems to be the best place where they can find acceptance for being so emotionally handicapped. The most wonderful thing is that whatever we never received as a child growing up, God can not only meet those needs (and desires to meet them, in fact) … but He can use the painful things of our past to make us a better person in Christ for it, but we must let Him. He never forces Himself on us. He’s too gentle. He’s too kind. He tries to win us over to His way of doing and seeing things through His love and mercy and kindness, because He knows that is how each of us best respond to change.

    The love of grandparents differs from the love of parents. For example, parents might say to their children, “Do not go to the carnival at this time for there could be wild people at this hour”, while grandparents might say, “Oh – let them enjoy youth; let them go; nothing will happen to them.” Parents are the protectors of their children that God has given them, but Grandparents reveal a glimpse of God’s grace in allowing things parents would not. Even as God’s children, sometimes it is healthy for us to be allowed by God to do things that really aren’t the best for us at the time, but because it sounds like fun, so He lets us do it, even if pain or harm results from it afterwards.

    Again, let me say to you; I am sure my parents loved me. Only perhaps either that they did not have the right opportunity to show it or they did not know how best to show their love for a uniquely sensitive boy that I was. Coming from any of those two possibilities, look at how messed up my life had become at the onset. I did not know that I was dying. Then, I wanted to end my life. My words to parents then would be…Please…please…please… little innocent and gullible children are little innocent and gullible children. Remember how I was. Please, I beg of you on there behalf, every now and then or perhaps… most of the time, you might want to whisper or say out loud to them the comforting and endearing words, “I love you”.

    I never heard those words. Also, every now and then, affirm such verbal claim of love and affection with a “hug” here and there. I never experienced how it felt like to be hugged. I am sure that their path in life would not be the same path I took at first if you did these things to them. Please don’t let them be like me when I was growing up. The prison cells I had were worst than you can imagine. They were worst than physical prison cells. I was hopeless, but now in Christ, I have hope. I was lost, but now in Christ, I am found. I was in many prison cells, but now in Christ, I am free. And for some others out there, some of you say there is no God. But look at my life. I could not have changed my life on my own for I was so deranged; so messed up and so full of blind fury, and all I could think of was how to die. And thus, there was no room at all for clear thinking even as I was so immersed in discipline training in my martial arts. It was as if I was in a hopelessly drunken state that I could not find my way towards changed direction from wrong to right.

    Here is the conclusion of my testimony. I changed direction not on my own, but only by God’s grace. God is true and He exists! It was Him who pulled me out of the pit of destruction! And thus, please allow me now to offer to Him my humble expression of deep gratitude and love.

    Our Father, Lord Jesus Christ, thank you for your unconditional love. Thank you for saving me. Thank you for my testimony of a changed life. And now please accept this humble offering of gratitude and love, Lord, God, our Father, “THIS ONE IS FOR YOU.” Please take it and do as You please for Your glory.” May Your praise be forever and ever, Amen.

    Email: [email protected] YouTube:


    Editorial Note: Edgar has felt to share much of his personal testimony by way of karate videos on YouTube to try to enhance people’s understanding of the intensity of what he had inside him until he could not contain it anymore. If you would like to see his six-part YouTube testimony using karate as a different way to express himself, you can do so by clicking on these six links: YouTube Part 1 YouTube Part 2 YouTube Part 3 YouTube Part 4 YouTube part 5 YouTube Part 6

    God’s means of freeing us from the “cancer” of bottled up anger is forgiveness, and learning to give Jesus Christ “our cares – our troubles.” Here is a writing that can help you understand better in how to deal with anger:

    Here is a writing that God may use to help you learn the importance of giving our cares – our troubles to Jesus:



  3. The natural man can understand “religion” ­ how religious organizations function, how they solicit finances, how they utilize propaganda to get their message out. The natural man can understand rational assent to religious tenets, propositions, principles, statements of history, theology, and doctrine. The natural man can understand adherence to a belief-system, or devotion to an ideology or an organization. The natural man can understand “spirituality” if it is defined as the serenity of “well-being”, or devotion to a meaningful cause, or the recollection of an ecstatic experience, or conformity to a moral ideal.

  4. To start let me say all though my life i was taught that god was real. As a kid i attended church and Sunday school. As a teen i didn’t pay much attention to him except to think i knew he was real. All though those years i only wanted to believe in god and honestly it was only half-heartedly. It wasn’t until 1992 when i graduated from high school and joined the Navy that i learned just how real he was. You see personally speaking i have a really hard time with people that have control over me. So boot camp was an extremely hard time for me. Some time into it my company commander didn’t like me i didn’t have too many friends and i was hating life. With all these things and the fact that i felt trapped i was contemplating killing myself. Now as a kid i had taken and asked god to forgive my sins and take me into his hands. In other words i asked god as a kid to forgive my sins an accepted him as my savior. Mind you this was as a kid and i personally do not think a kid can do that (really anyways). So one night while in boot camp i prayed to god. I once again accepted him as my savior but while praying i told him i wanted him to prove himself to me where there was no doubt no argument that could persuade me that he did in fact do it. I must of prayed for a good 10 to 15 minutes that night. That night i had also decided that in the morning if he didnt come to me i would go though with the suicide. I was going to jump off a bridge that was there during the morning run and that would be that. Well and this is the best part of the story, and understand that my depression was so deep that i didn’t see a way out. I woke in the morning with such a joy and excitement and a love in which i had never felt before. All i wanted to do is goto a church and sing (I am personally to shy to sing in front of people) but i could now. I cant explain the true feelings i was feeling. All i can say is that i believe that god showed me what heaven itself will be like. The joy and happiness is so intense its indescribable. I knew without a doubt that god himself touched my heart. He actually came and touched me in such a way that i could not argue it. Any thought of suicide were gone and only thing i wanted to do is praise his being. I have never forgotten that day because to me that is the day he honestly saved me. I just wanted to share my story with you all Thank you for reading it =)

  5. My Testimony of Working with Charismatic Catholics
    and other thoughts on the subject of tongues/

    Bill Scudder Dayton, Ohio, USA
    [email protected]

    I would like to say first of all that I am not a Cecessionist. I do not believe the Gifts of the Holy Spirit ceased with the New Testament Apostles. They are available to the Church of God today.

    For those who do not believe the above, you are still my brother or sister in the Lord if you believe that we are saved by grace alone through faith alone on account of Christ alone. What I am about to tell you is not ‘politically correct’ and I will be labeled as ‘intolerant’ or maybe even a ‘basher’ by some people. I love Catholics, as I do anyone else, but it is the doctrine’s of Rome that are deceiving the Catholics. Much of what I have to say not only applies to Catholic Charismatics but to all Catholics in general.


    President of the FGBMF-Peoria, Illinois

    It started when I was voted in as President of a local chapter of the Full Gospel Businessmen’s Fellowship International. We had a dinner meeting once a month and a breakfast meeting once a month. At the dinner meeting we would usually invite a Christian businessman to give his testimony. I also held a Bible study and prayer meeting in my home.
    Catholics began to come to my home prayer and Bible study meeting, including a priest. The first thing this priest did was kneel in front of me, as if I could impart something to him. Later I knew that he wanted me to pray that he would receive tongues. Later that night I sat down with him and the scriptures and tried to explain to him the plan of salvation. My words and scriptures seemed to address deaf ears. His “religion” seemed to have a shield around him so the “Gospel” could not be heard.

    I became a friend with this Priest and we began to attend other meetings together. More Catholics started coming to all of our meetings and I invited a Catholic professor from Ball State University to come and speak to our fellowship.

    It wasn’t long until many of these Catholics were seeking and receiving tongues. At the time I just took it for granted that they were already saved and were receiving the Baptism of the Holy Spirit Priests, nuns and others were beginning to receive tongues. I was guilty of believing that tongues was an indication that we shared the same Holy Spirit experience, and the same Jesus. This was due to my ignorance of the ‘Gospel according to Rome,’ for which I have no excuse.

    I was invited to teach a course one night a week for six weeks in a Roman Catholic Parish, St. Monica In East Peoria, Illinois. Priests, nuns and others were present. I taught on the gift of Salvation. At the time I was not prepared for what I was confronting and because all present at the meetings deemed themselves already saved because of the Roman Catholic religion. I don’t believe I addressed the subject in the right way. There was a spirit of bondage given to them by Rome and they had a dependence on their infant baptism and other doctrines of Rome which nullify the Gospel.

    I was invited to attend Catholic Charismatic prayer meetings at Bradley University as the only non-Catholic present.

    One of the Catholic prayer groups were speaking in tongues and receiving unbiblical interpretations of a sinful nature, supposedly coming direct from Mary, ‘the mother
    of Jesus’. Which was further proof that the unsaved were receiving ‘tongues’ from a spirit other than God. Charismatic Catholics often become more devoted to Mary after receiving a tongue that was not from the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit only glorifies Christ.


    Many Catholic Charismatics have migrated to Mary, whom they see as the Holy Spirit’s ‘more interesting spouse.’ The Catholic Charismatic fellowship at Dayton University reported to the news media that since their ‘experience’ they have been giving more devotion to Mary. In the statement nothing was said about Christ.

    That does not mean that we do not honor Mary at all for her physical part in the birth of
    Christ but we cannot venerate her more than the scriptures allow or make her in any way Spiritually responsible for our salvation.


    contrary to popular expectations, the sign of tongues that Catholics received brought back to Catholicism those who had fallen away, reviving their idolatrous practices. Some typical comments from Catholic charismatics illustrate this:

    –“Our devotion to Mary was filled with sanctification.”

    –“The sacramental life of the church has become richer in meaning.”

    –“I came to a better understanding of the Eucharist as a sacrifice, and I came back to frequent confession.”

    –“At that time I discovered a profound devotion to Mary.”

    Is the spirit that is active in the Roman Church, the Holy Spirit? In speaking of Him, Jesus said, “He will guide you into all truth”. This is the particular characteristic of the Holy Spirit. It is characteristic of an evil spirit to lead one into only part of the truth.

    Now, one of the most marked effects of the Catholic charismatic movement is to lead its followers into part-truth, part-error as, for example: spontaneous prayer AND the rosary; the adoration of Christ AND the Holy Sacrament; reading the Bible AND the veneration of Mary.

    There are several testimonies from people who had been baptized by the “Holy Spirit”, one while reciting his rosary, another while singing a hymn at mass, and yet another while on her knees praying to the Holy Virgin. These testimonies are quite sufficient to prove that the spirit who baptized these people is in contradiction with the Scriptures and cannot, in any way, be the Holy Spirit. Blasphemy against the Holy Spirit consists, not of doubting His work, but of attributing such error and such dreadful idolatry to His divine person. To quote Charles Foster, “When the experience of the Holy Spirit is put before doctrine and salvation, seduction is certain…”


    A Catholic Priest who was a sought after speaker in the Catholic Charismatic movement and spoke at many FGBMFI chapters, was speaking one night to a large group during one of our FGBMFI conventions. After his talk he gave an altar call to come and be ‘born again.’ I had an uneasy feeling, and after the service was over, I approached to ask him some questions. I asked him if Jesus was the only way to be saved, and he said very plainly, ‘NO.’ I asked, ‘Do you have to be born again and believe in Jesus Christ to be saved and he said ‘NO.’ What did he mean by ‘born again’?

    It was obvious he meant that if you received tongues or any kind of subjective feeling, that this was proof of being born again, having nothing to do with being born from above by the Spirit of God or believing in Christ alone for salvation.

    At that point I rebuked him for what he said and he got very angry and began to shake. I reported him to FGBMFI but nothing came of it. There are several kinds of Roman Catholics. The Catholic church is not as united as they would like everyone to believe. There is the liberal that believes God is the Father of all and no-one is lost and the one that believes that if you do good works and are baptized you will be saved and the traditional pre-Vatican 2 Catholic that believes that only through the Roman Catholic church can you be saved. Then there are all those in between.

    ((The Roman Catholic religion in its quest for ecumenism is now playing both sides as is seen in Vatican II. “”….

    An article published by the Dallas Morning News on Saturday March 20Th, 1999 of an ecumenical meeting held in Dallas, Thanksgiving World Assembly, shows the other side.

    What is important about this meeting is that it was attended by a Nigerian Cardinal of the Roman Catholic religion named Francis Arinze.

    Many people think that Arinze, the Pope’s Deputy for Outreach, is heir apparent to John Paul II. But even if he is not, his comments are chilling and revealing.

    An illustration of Roman Catholic ecumenism, which ices out the Gospel and makes mockery of the ministry of Jesus Christ, is found in Arinze’s answer to the question, “Can you still get to heaven without accepting Jesus?”His answer, not surprising, but chilling and ominous, is: “Expressly, yes!”

    He says””…..Gods grant of salvation includes not only Christians but Jews,Muslims, Hindus and people of good will.” ))


    Note the following quote (Dallas Morning News, 12-09-00):

    By Peggy Polk
    and Robert Nowell

    VATICAN CITY, Dec. 6 (RNS)–Tempering a controversial Vatican declaration on salvation, Pope John Paul II said Wednesday that all who live a just life will be saved even if they do not believe in Jesus Christ and the Roman Catholic Church.

    The Pope blatantly contradicts the Bible

    © 2000 Discerning the Times Digest and NewsBytes
    On March 26, 2000.
    The popular Catholic Pope John Paul II blatantly contradicted the Bible on December 7 when he proclaimed “Heaven is open to all as long as they are good,” even for “those who ignore Christ and his Church.”
    The Bible clearly teaches only those who have accepted Jesus Christ as the only way of salvation will be saved.
    The December 8, Electronic Telegraph reported the Pope as saying that “Heaven is open to all as long as they are good.”

    3. The Holy Spirit is not only present in other religions through authentic expressions of prayer. “The Spirit’s presence and activity”, as I wrote in the Encyclical Letter Redemptoris missio, “affect not only individuals but also society and history, peoples, cultures and religions” (n. 28).Normally, “it will be in the sincere practice of what is good in their own religious traditions and by following the dictates of their own conscience that the members of other religions respond positively to God’s invitation and receive salvation in Jesus Christ, even while they do not recognize or acknowledge him as their Saviour (cf. Ad gentes, nn. 3, 9, 11)” (Pontifical Council for Interreligious Dialogue


    In spite of the mistakes of being too ecumenical with those that do not believe the Gospel, the FGBMFI has been and is being used of God, and many have been saved through it’s efforts, but I and others, have been guilty of an ecumenical spirit and unity at any cost. We have given a false hope of security to those who needed the truth of salvation.

    Catholics no longer a mission field?

    Some Evangelicals are now saying that Roman Catholics are no longer considered to be a mission field since they are ‘Christians’, as evidenced in the document ECT,(Evangelicals and Catholics together).

    What a sad commentary to our brothers and sisters in Latin countries, and others who have laid down their lives for the Gospel, and have seen millions of Roman Catholics believe the Gospel. The future of evangelism hangs in the balance.

    In my eight years of working with Charismatic Catholics, I have come to the following conclusions.

    I had been naive and had neglected to really look into the doctrine of the Roman Catholic Church to see what they really believed about the doctrine of Salvation by Grace alone through faith alone on account of Christ alone. I took it for granted that they believed the Gospel of the Bible. I had not prepared and made serious mistakes. After study I found that historically, and conversely, the Roman Catholic Church teaches as dogma, that justification is conferred through her sacraments, and that it consists of inner righteousness whereby a man, it is stated, becomes ‘just within himself.’ The Church of Rome condemns the Biblical doctrine of justification by faith alone. (Council of Trent)

    Any non-Catholic Church that held the doctrines of the Roman Catholic Church would be considered a ‘Cult’ by many of the same people who are seeking unity with the Catholics.

    I have discovered that most Protestants do not know what the Gospel is ‘according to Rome’! And are easy prey for Roman Catholic apologists because they do not know how to defend sola scriptura or because of their extreme arminism. Do we once again need a reformation in the ‘Protestant’Evangelical Churches?

    It was the standard practice of the FGBMFI to tell Roman Catholics to stay in the Catholic Church so that they could witness to others and I find this to be true also in many protestant/Pentecostal Church’s. I believe this was a very dangerous attitude in that I found those who stayed eventually were lost to the Roman Church once again for various reasons or because they had not been truly born again. I believe most of the ones who had trusted in Christ alone for salvation came out of the Roman Catholic Church.

    You cannot stay in a Church, without consequences, that denies we are saved by what Christ did outside of us, and not what we can do to become worthy inside.

    “Solo Christo”

    “Solo Christo” was one of the cries of the Protestant Reformation. Translated from the Latin, it means “Christ Alone.”

    In these times, the growing tendency to emphasize feelings and experiences at the expense of sound doctrine is presenting the world with a ‘feel-good’ religious community, the boundaries of which grow more ephemeral with every new ecumenical pronouncement. This is especially true among Roman Catholics and some Evangelical and some Charismatic Christians. I want to emphasize that not all Evangelicals and Pentecostals are being deceived but some are.

    And the lines become more blurred, so that now in some ecumenical meetings, New Agers, Universalists, Roman Catholic as well as “some” true born again Christians such as Evangelicals and Pentecostals are coming together to celebrate their oneness in a quote, ‘Common Experience.’ This is the great deception.

    Although speaking in tongues can be valid experience from God it is not always of the Holy Spirit. It can be counterfeited. Satan has counterfeits of every Gift of God. You can receive an experience without being saved, and when this happens it leads to many problems. The major problem is a false sense of security that you are saved, and leads you further away from the true Gospel and many times into the occult. It has been documented that most spiritulists are former Catholics.

    If we accept everybody as brothers and sisters because they speak in tongues, then we are heading down a slippery slope, Catholic or other wise.
    (Spiritual experience ALONE can never be the basis for unity.
    Unity must be based on sound DOCTRINE.

    Some may have a legitimate question about laying hands on unbelievers. some bitterly regret having prayed for and laid hands on these Catholics who have, according to some Pentecostal testimony, received an alien spirit as a result. Does this mean that “we” transmit ed an evil spirit from us to them? In our ignorance God would not allow us to transmit the Holy Spirit or an unclean spirit to a unregenerated person but we have been guilty of helping that person open up to an unclean spirit.

    There are many theological reasons that a Catholic can not be a true Christians. Catholic doctrines that make salvation for them null and void.

    “If anyone comes with another doctrine, do not receive him….for he who greets him shares in his evil deeds.”
    Holy Bible 2 John 10-11 KJV.

    “Stand fast therefore in the liberty wherewith Christ hath made us free, and be not entangled again with the yoke of bondage.”
    Galatians 5:1. KJV


    Bill Scudder
    Dayton, Ohio, USA [email protected]

    Permission is given by the author to copy this testimony to be used in any way provided it is reproduced in its entirety including my e-mail address without change and that the following disclaimer be included. This testimony may be pasted on any other site but does not mean I agree with all other documents or links listed there.

  6. The Word Of God Tell’s as in John 1:7
    He came as a witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all men might believe.

    Read This verse Too…….. John 5:31
    “If I testify about myself, my testimony is not valid. ( meaning we have to testify and give witness about His Wonders of His Love)

    Let us Tell Others about Our Good God and the good things He Has done in Your Life.

    I Invite you to start testifying for Jesus.
    2 Timothy 1:8 (Whole Chapter)
    So do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord, or ashamed of me his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God,

  7. Diane Daley says:

    I am convinced about one thing above all: that Jehovah God is Lord,He is awesome and with Him all things are possible. I have so many testimonies of His grace and mercy, and I’ll share at least one with you.

    During my first year in University, some friends and I decided we would have prayer meetings on Fridays. The Thursday before our first meeting, I suddenly became very ill. Every atom and molecule of my body was in unnatural pain, from head to toe. Vomiting, diarrhea, blood in stool were just a few of my symptoms. In no time I was pale, lost a lot of weight. I visited the doctor.

    I was referred for all types of tests. It became tiring. Some results were negative, some inconclusive!! I felt like I was dying, but the doctors confessed they could not treat me as they had no idea what was the problem. During this time I realized that my only source of help would be God. I kept telling myself “I shall not die but live and declare the works of the Lord.” I was still dying though. My friends cried every time they saw me. My parents were sick with worry. Some suggested I seek help from dark powers!! I swore I would rather die if the Lord doesn’t heal me, than indulge in anything satanic!! I made it known that My God is the healer, the giver of life, the Creator of Heaven and earth.If it was His will, He would heal me.

    After weeks of suffering and getting worse, I spoke to a woman of God. She understood my plight and agreed with me that God is able to deliver. She took a bottle of olive oil, consecrated it in prayer and anointed my forehead calling on the name of Jehovah God our Healer.

    From that moment, every pain vanished. All illness and syptoms ceased and I was delivered that very moment. I went back to the doctor and they were astounded at the change in my health. I told them it was a miracle from God, God is great, and should be praised. I believe He made all things and there is nothing impossible with Him. Praise the Lord our God!!!

  8. hillbillyman says:

    Probably the most dramatic thing to happen to me apart from salvation is a healing I experienced some eighteen years ago, or so. I was working for a local utility company and was asked by my supervisor to put a new license plate on my truck. Come to find out, the old one was attached by a rusty old piece of wire coat hanger. When I went to untwist the wire, It cut me between two fingers. A small wound, to be sure, but it bled and it hurt a lot. I grabbed my hand and prayed over it, and when the pain subsided, forgot about it. Well, on a job site a couple hours later, I remembered my cut hand and looked for the wound I was astonished to see that the would was completely healed, not even a scar, just some blood on my shirt to remind me that I had even had a cut on my hand. Praise the Lord.

  9. no_obstacle says:

    As a first time writer, I believe that I have written an extraordinary work of non-fiction, for I have truly lived an unimaginable life. There is nothing glamorous about this story, and I make no excuses, “No obstacle too great” invites you on a riveting roller coaster ride, as it’s a journey through a life that has been nothing short of a shattered and tormented existence, which in its wake of forty-six years, has transformed itself by the Grace of God, from the unimaginable, to the extraordinary.

    “I have faced many obstacles throughout my life,and none of it really mattered ! Not the twenty-five years of criminality, not the fourteen years I spent in prison, nor the thirty-five years of alcoholism, or the twelve years within narcotic drug addiction.

    All this in itself made my life very complicated, however to understand the true nature of unimpenetrable hardships, now add to the already incomprehensible horrors of my life, the devastating and incurable HIV infection, which on three seperate ocassions, having come out of remission, threatened to extinquish my life. None of this mattered more than trying to understand the Why, or more specifically What had for most of my life, left me colder than that iceberg that sank the Titanic .”

    It has not only been through my writing, but more so within the struggles of positive changes, that in themselves can only be attributed to that of Divine Intervention. Within this journey I have faced and come to terms with my most paralyzing fears, unraveling the mysteries of my tormented life. However in order to truly understand the why, one must first fully explore the often painful, yet complicated paradoxes between our tormented yesterdays, and the struggles of today. As its within our past and present that we will find the answers to a more successful tomorrow.

    “The answers although brutal, haunting and complex,declare themselves in each chapter”

    In life,if you find a road without obstacles,it probably doesn’t lead anywhere

    Everything about this book presently remains in its original form, as it was written by me in 2001. In 2004,I first self published my work through WindShift Press here in Canada. Although the reviews I recieved were in themselves powerful, without the proper promotion and exposure, the book sat collecting dust. After speaking at a local high school a few times, I re-wrote, or should I say I one finger typed No obstacle again, weaving my ten thousand word speech into its body. In 2006 I again self published through Rosedog Publishing in the States. Again as is true of our own lives, things are not as they appear to be.

    It definitely wasn’t by accident, chance or any preconceived plan that now in my fiftieth year, I found myself on the steps of the Emmanuel Pentecostal Church here in New Westminster, British Columbia, Canada. I remember this particular night very vividly in my mind, it was the beginning of November, and as was my nature, I had arrived early. There was a slight chill in the breezy coolness of the evening air; however the spine wrenching chills that now penetrated the depths of my soul, had absolutely nothing to do with the weather. Although I was still trying with difficulty to grasp the significance of divine intervention, and the role it’s unquestionably played within my life, I was about to jump my greatest hurdle and accept Jesus as my personal savior, and be baptized in His name.

    As I nervously paced back and forth in a restless apprehension within the church’s inner courtyard, my thoughts frantically raced in many different directions, and everything for the moment seemed to be beyond my immediate comprehension. I was gripped within a combination of thoughts or were they in actuality revelations, that momentarily embraced me, not so much in fear, but more so in a reverent awe. Within an unknown familiarity, I had carefully been studying this historical church from many angles, and noticed that it had not only weathered many of its own storms throughout its colorful history, but within its determined persistency, resisted and overcome all of life’s obstacles.

    Suddenly any clarification I needed regarding the hardships of my life, and what it all meant, my answers now seemed to be found within the rustic nature of the church’s very appearance, where I saw my own persistent and determined character etched within its rugged beauty. It was within those brief precious seconds that I somehow grasped with conviction, that Christ all along knew the circumstances of my life.

    As the church is now considering the possibility of re-publishing my book into its third life, the only exceptions have been made to the dedications, the introduction, and to the offensive language, which I had decided to omit from the text as well.

    The writing of this book was in and of itself at times not only a very painful experience, but in the same breath, has become an invaluable journey of self-discovery and spiritual awakening. My life as I’ve now come to understand it has played itself out within God’s molding process in four different stages, and the following story is but the tip of the iceberg. I am almost near completion of my second manuscript entittled ” In memory of an angel “, and well into my third work of non-fiction ” Leaves in the wind “, which are continuations to an already incredible life, however it is within these pages, and what lies beyond “No obstacle too great”, that truly gives God’s Majestic Grace its breathlessness.

    In considering myself somewhat of a writer, especially in words of a non-fictional description, its then within this capacity that I now assume an even greater responsibility. For when in words of this very nature, I must be ever so careful in their structure, as they will in one form or another leave an impact upon people’s lives. The beauty within the truth and conviction of my shattered life will only be measured by the extent of its influential appreciation.

    Without having the benefit of a full education, nor ever having been schooled towards being a writer.I have, through my greatest internal struggles come to understand and accept the reality, that I have been entrusted by what can only in all its definitions be considered a gift, that is not of this world”. Even tougher was the understanding that this gift was not for my benefit, instead its purpose was to be a blessing to others.

    The facts within my written testimony will undisputedly give evidence that God Himself directed the steps of my life, and is sitting mightily upon His Throne, and preparing for the return of our Blessed Savior Jesus Christ. As seen throughout the irrefutable written word, from the beginning of creation, regardless of the brutalities within oppressive dictatorships, or the catastrophes that have continually hammered each successive generation, or the acts of war, that have continually threatened, to weaken and stagger the progression of mankind. Regardless of the devastating addictions, or the incomprehensible illnesses that not only continue to cripple humanity daily, but within their path of destruction, disable entire communities, and threaten nations as a whole. “God has throughout the ages, within every generation, brought forward an abundance of prophetic voices from all nations. These are His chosen ambassadors, messengers elect, who within their own powerful testimonies, can, have and will continue to deliver His people from the suffocating bondages, unleashed by the enemy of all Righteousness.

    In writing these words, I am fearful to place myself even within a consideration of such a privileged position, however when in reflection of my life, one can’t but help marvel at the extraordinary night and day differences, or the seemingly impossible positive transformations. Never within my sorrowful life was there anything that would substantiate my being a man of great wisdom, nor was there any indication that my life was destined for anything other than misery and suffering, as within its first forty years, it had certainly played itself out in the very pits of hell.

    Of my own resources I could never, ever have changed the course of my destructive life, although without unquestionable dispute, I am a living testimony to the fact that Our Lord God does in fact hear our cry of help, and it does not matter whether this plea was one of faith or unbelief, as the two walk hand in hand. As long as we allow ourselves to be molded by the Grace of the Holy Spirit, God will heal and restore all the broken pockets of our lives, to heights greater than their original state. My own perception of my very existence could be tragically summed up within the following metaphor;

    “For a moment, try to imagine during the beginning stages of your life being abandoned in the middle of a raging sea, left alone without the benefit of even a life preserver. Each of my years had brought its own thundering wave crashing down upon me, threatening to shallow me in its darkest depth. With an unexplainable willpower, I battled each treacherous wave. In reaching its peak and briefly catching my breath, as I aimlessly drifted into the next unknown valley. I’m once again drawn into an unrestrained despair, longing for my life itself to cease, as on the horizon I see the next hideous wave approaching with a terrifying ferociousness. Through many years of painful reflection, I’ve come to understand with a clearer appreciation, that something far greater than anything within myself, had not only kept me afloat, but instilled within me a persistent and determined desire to rise above anything life had to offer. ”

    From my earliest childhood within its innocent purity there was a sexual molestation, which left its filthy stain and torturously haunted the deepest corridors of my mind. There was insurmountable instability due in part to parental abandonment, as they pursued their own selfish wants and needs above those of their children, which ingrained within my personality, a deep rooted dysfunctional insecurity.

    At fifteen years old I began my thirty-five year battle with chronic alcoholism. One year later I embarked on a life of crime, prison survival and violence that spanned the next twenty years, of which fourteen were spent in various prisons. At thirty-years of age I became a narcotic drug addict as well, which I battled for the following twelve years. If such a life wasn’t in itself enough to drive you to the brink of insanity, buckle your seat belt as it gets worse. As a result of my addictions and unpredictable behaviors I was told I have the HIV infection, and that my life would be very short-lived.

    Twelve years have now passed since that devastating diagnosis, and as I am writing these very words, without any hesitancy, beyond a shadow of a doubt, or a murmur of uncertainty, I know that God Himself delivered me to Emmanuel Pentecostal church to be baptized in His name. Yes the reality clearly now exists within my mind, that my life, before its very conception, to this very moment in time, had been pre-orchestrated for a specific and meaningful purpose.” God within His glory is using the circumstances of my shattered and tormented life as a further means of restoring the blind to sight. ”

    Something I wrote and believe in very much:

    Moving mountains and walking on the water

    Every addiction along with every negative behavior or influence in our lives, is a mountain, and when in sincerety and committment give that mountain to God, within each day of abstinence, the mountain takes a step away from us. Eventually it disapears from our sight, no longer having any signifigance in our lives, therefore we have just went from what was once a crippling impossibility, to a living reality, and just like peter we too now walk on the water…

    The powerful transformations within God’s Majestic molding process began in 1997, my fortieth year. This was the year that my life had literally lost all its meaning, and it was while in serious thoughts of self extinction, that I had somehow for the first time found the courage to ask God for a miracle…It’s very strange that I would make such a request, for I had never within my life embraced a true faith or belief, and wasn’t sure if I was even capable of ever doing this, for there never within my life existed a hope that could have been extinguished.

    Almost from birth, my mind had been a continual habitation of demons, where the very powers, and principalities of darkness themselves have manipulated my life, like a puppet on a string. It has only been through deep reflection, while exploring the complicated and entwined paradoxes that made up my life, between the issues of right and wrong, to distinguishing reality from the painted illusions I had created within this complex puzzle which represented my mind, that the evidence clearly now in my mind manifests itself. Christ within the helplessness of my circumstances had patiently carried me, and it did not matter whether it was in faith or unbelief, He was waiting for my cry of help, which would “ignite that unknown spark of hope with a fierce and persistent determination.”

    In the bible, the book of Ezekiel, chapter thirty-seven tells about a valley full of dry bones, where God himself asks Ezekiel if he believes, whether He, Lord God can bring these bones back to life. Our very own lives, whether viewed through the hardships of our circumstances, or those suffocating nooses of crippling addictions and devastating illnesses, represent that very same valley of dry bones.

    The questions we must often find ourselves in need of an answer are; can our faith allow us to believe that God can restore our dry bones back to life? Where does this faith come from, and how does one get it! Rest assured, entertaining the reality of God within your life, is not an exercise of futility! How can I be sure of this? From that very moment ten years ago, in my brokenness and unbelief, when I called upon the Lord, God has miraculously blessed my life many times, while continuously tapping me on the shoulder trying to capture my attention, and until a year ago, I didn’t even know it.

    As with anything in this life, nothing comes easy, to be successful there is a progression of events within that process, and this as well includes entering the kingdom of Heaven. As my words come from a heart that was once encrusted within layers of hardened callousness, I empathetically understand that it’s easier said than done, when I ask you to believe that not only is faith in itself is a powerful gift of transforming grace, but that within us there exists an awesome God, who can and will restore the shattered pieces of our lives.

    It’s never easy, always remember that even for those that profess a long fellowship in Christ, have a hard time with faith. Having been at the end of my rope many times throughout my life, I’m very familiar within the concept from an unbeliever’s perspective, or those struggling with unpredictable addictions, and incomprehensible illnesses, to that person who for the first time enters a church, never having known the Lord.

    It’s almost second nature, and certainly within thier world of dysfunctional familiarity, it’s much easier for them to readily accept the harshness of their existence as fate, or just the way the cards of life were dealt to them, rather than trying to grasp the immeasurable reality of God. However as long as you continue to hang on to this delusional thinking, you will never have anything greater than surviving yet another day, as your life continues within it’s daily grind of disparity and hopelessness.

    Faith in it’s most simplistic nature has always been within our grasp, and the key to unlocking its mystery lies in these very words. ” In order to have a faith you first must have a belief, to have a belief there must be an acknowledgement of a higher power, a super natural force greater than yourself, which has been guiding the very steps of your life!

    Our most painful journey, and I just can’t stress it enough will be that one of internal reflection, especially more so in terms of a destructive life, as it’s there that the very foundations of change or growth of any kind must first begin. Sometimes it sounds as though the preacher is trying to sell us an elusive treasure map, which is definitely not the case. It’s only when you look deep within yourself, you’ll not only come to understand that all those night and day differences within your life are the map, and that you within their definitions, are the immeasurable treasure. Once fully explored, the possibilities of the unknown will be awakened, and you to will begin to realize the unlimited realities within the world of the impossible.It’s there that you’ll begin to find that undeniable faith.

    As a result of my testimony, should you recieve the benefit of insightfullness, that would in itself alter the course of your life, especially if it were of a destructive nature, or if you recieve any hope, and encouragement, as to overcoming the hardships of addictions, circumstances, or coping with an unsufferable illness,”don’t thank me, for this book and the ones to follow were never about me, give praise to God above. I believe with a firm conviction that my writing, is a gift from God, which could be His way of taking the sting out of my own sufferings.

    Throughout my life all the signs of Divine Intervention had always been present, from crippling addictions, to the night and day differences of positive changes. Amidst it all, I walked within the shadows of death itself, where failure almost always appeared as a welcomed luxury, as I continually wrestled with the incurable, yet devastating hardship of the HIV infection, which threatened on many fronts to extinguish my very life.

    Whether I was in search of this faith, or inadvertently running away from it, ten long years passed before I was to grasp the significance, and very reverence of divine intervention, and the role it’s played in my life. This supernatural, yet mystical force that in its Supremacy, as I’ve now come to understand and accept it, is God on the Throne, had not abandoned me, but instead embraced me within His merciful tenderness, and continued within His graceful beauty, to transform a life that was all but lost…


    I now know that throughout my severest trials, and the greatest storms of my weathered life, it was God alone who had within those storms, been my life preserver. If only we could truly see and envision that those night and differences throughout our lives, could in fact be those cross-roads within their own mythical nature, where our physical world and the spiritual one meet. It’s within this interpretation, that this book is dedicated to the Everlasting Glory of God…

    I wish to extend prayers of deep and eternal gratitude to my best friend Bonnie Wilson, whom by the grace of God has been one of the greatest night and day, differences in my life. Without her influential encouragement and spiritual guidance, I would still be walking about aimlessly lost. Her unwavering loyalty of friendship, gives this word within her graceful elegance, a divine definition all of its own. She has truly left an everlasting trail of footprints, engraved deep within my heart…At times it seemed like she had called in her own personal excavation crew, as together we sat within countless hours, while in reflection of my weathered life, and searched the very depths of my tortured soul. I’ m not sure how it happened, but she had melted the coldness that for so long had imprisoned my heart, and once she had peeled away all the calloused layers, mystically like on the wings of a dove while at the altar with me, gave it to God. If there were no tomorrow, I would want her to always know that I consider her friendship, after our Lord Jesus, the greatest gift of my life.

    Also a great thanks to Pastor David Jobson, for he had made it perfectly clear to me that within any church, membership was never meant to be, nor should it ever be, a prerequisite in the path of baptism. His passion alone was in my desire to be baptized in the name of Jesus. Ministries around the world should grasp the significance within these words of wisdom.” Anyone whose heart has finally opened, expressing a desire for baptism, which may in and of itself have arose from within, but a moment of Divine Revelation. Therefore God’s servants should clearly understand the importance and careful attention now necessary which is greatly dependant upon their unwavering faithfulness. For it’s within this leap of faith that any hesitation, unwillingness, or the slightest inattention and neglect within the significance of baptism, will all weigh heavily on the balancing scale towards a successful conversion.”

    My deepest appreciation and respect is given to the widely recognized Pastor Paul Reynolds, Bishop of the Emmanuel Pentecostal Church, here in British Columbia, Canada. It was in listening to his message.” It’s the second birth that counts” that for the first time in forty years, I was truly able to grasp the uniqueness of forgiveness, which made all my bitterness and resentments completely insignificant. Within their own instrumental sphere of patience, wisdom and spiritual enrichment, these Saints of God entered my life in what can only be described as a welcomed sweet smelling gentle mist, as their presence continues to embrace the depths of my very soul.


    “My greatest sense of contribution and fufillment has been in the fact that somehow from my unbelievable struggles, all those that have thus far read No obstacle too great, as seen by the inspiring testimonials have felt it’s impact, which in some way has made a difference in their lives…”

    I just finished your book,No Obstacle Too Great.Thanks again for the signed copy of the book-Adrienne and I were thrilled to receive it. Here is a copy of my review:

    Reading Mino Pavlic’s memoir No Obstacle Too Great ,I felt like a voyeur watching a man’s life unfold.Beginning with his childhood and adolescence moving across countries and between continents,then continuing through his adult years spent in and out of prison,and struggling with addiction,and finally finishing with his recent struggles to turn his life around.

    Mino gives the reader a sense of his life’s history through detailed vignettes.For those of us who are unfamiliar with the world of crime,incarceration,and hard-core drug addiction,No Obstacle Too Great,provides a poignant picture of a life very different from our own.The memoir reveals a man moving from living in the moment to contemplating his past,present,and future.The content is complelling,but so too is the writing; that someone who has gone through so much pain could write so freely about it.The book is a window through which the process of one man’s change and development is revealed.

    No Obstacle Too Great allows the reader a glimpse into the author’s life and a world many of us choose to ignore,and into how life is lived more fully through reflection and connection.
    Nicole Bermbach,M.A.,C.C.C.
    Research coordinator
    BC Centre for Excellence in HIV/AIDS Canadian clinical Trials Network
    5th Floor,ST.Paul’s Hospital
    Vancouver,British Columbia,Canada.


    I could not put the book down. I was mesmerized. I have never read a book where the author does not make excuses or shift blame for criminal behaviors that led to many times behind bars. He led a bad life and does not try to say it was his upbringing or other factors. He takes responsibility for his own actions.It is up front and says it exactly as it was. I would recommend this book be required reading in every single school and library for children everywhere to read and serve as an example to save many of them from going down the wrong road. It proves that no matter how bad a person is,he can change if he really puts his mind to it and realizes what his actions has caused. In this case the result is very sad but it is good that it is not the end result. I really enjoyed this book and read it twice already and plan to read it some more.
    Rose Fromenthal.Morgan City,Louisianna,U.S.A

    I am very impressed by how the author has written his story and it makes you feel as if you are right there reliving his experiences. It is the reality of what life of crime is truly all about and the consequences that he himself is paying dearly for by being HIV positive from drug use. Today this would be perfect book for kids to show them that what they may think as cool and tough behavior with friends may end in fatal consequences. If he can save one kid I think this book is worth to share. He is living proof that a person can reverse a path of crime and instead of leaving a legacy of violence can leave a legacy of peace. He is not afraid to renounce the violent life he led publicly and he lets others see where such a life leads and it is not a pretty picture. His story reaches out and grips you in a way that you never forget.He should be honored for his courage to speak out against the way of life that he led for most of his life. He can be used as an example for anybody that has problems that they feel they can’t overcome. He shows that anything is possible.
    Caitlan Singetary.Morgan City,Louisianna.U.S.A.

    To Whom It May Concern

    Re: Mino Pavlic

    In the Spring of 2005 Mr. Pavlic addressed my Criminology 12 class at Mission Secondary. For an hour Mino wound through his personal story of choices and consequences, drug addiction and crime, failure and success and then answered difficult questions with candor and sincerity. I was pleased my students had the opportunity to share his experiences and hear his message.

    Mino puts a face to the dark stranger, the East End addict, the H.I.V. infected patient facing and struggling with the results of his choices. He offers himself as an example and speaks with passion against substance abuse of all kinds. He does not minimize the small steps in the beginning, but links each step, each choice, to outcomes and possible tradgedy. He is an effective anti-drug spokesperson.

    Mino’s message is also about hope, the will to succeed, and the ability to meet challenges. No Obstacle Too Great contains an important message and is a message of what can be achieved if one has the will and confidence. The writing of the book stands as an example to young adults facing graduation and wondering if they are capable of fulfilling their dreams.

    I am pleased to support Mino’s quest to tell his story. He is passionate about helping others and I believe he has a significant contribution to make.

    Yours truly,



    Comments from John Howard Society

    Thanks again for coming over and sharing your experience, strength and hope. Here’s a snapshot of staff comments and a few other observations. There is no judgement here, only open and honest observations.

    Appropriate language
    Outstanding potential

    We are genuinely impressed with your courage and desire to help others. We have respect for what you have achieved in putting your past in the past.

    As for your relationship with the Nanaimo Region John Howard Society, please be assured that we consider ourselves as equals as we, too, are not perfect and are still growing. We feel in terms of public speaking that you are kind of like a diamond in the rough. Our recommendation is to come over and hear one of our more experienced speakers with the door left open for further discussions. It is important that you hear that we want to continue the relationship.

    Nanaimo Region John Howard Society, British Columbia, Canada

    “I would never have believed that any normal man could have endured such hardship in his life, and yet, make such a turn around. ”
    Rebecca L-A Cadger, Security, Douglas College


    “It is well written, with humor mixed with passion and very factual. The prison system certainly is an eye opener and I think this book would be good for all youngsters in this day and time to read…this book is evident that Mino Pavlic has tremendous perseverance. He never gives up, no matter how many times he is knocked down, he continues to pick himself up and he doesn’t stop until he gets it right.”
    Doreen Kreschuk, Groupwise, Douglas College, British Columbia Canada.


    “I don’t know how you survived, but you did and I’m grateful that this book came out of all your trials and tribulations. Anyone who believes they are struggling against the odds in whatever circumstances can gain inspiration from your story.” Chris Gibson, Dept;of student development. Douglas College. New Westminister, British Columbia, Canada.


    “Remarkable story of great courage, determination, fortitude and endurance of spirit against seemingly insurmountable odds. An epic human story in a rapidly changing social environment.”
    Doctor Webb, Helen Anna and Marilyn


    I have been a member of for a number of years. It’s a site composed of writers from around the world. To date I have over 500 inspirational reviews in regards to all of my writing, and I humbly share the following ones:

    Swagman wrote,
    You write about having a future purpose for your life and dealing with past atrocities, I can relate to both. I often wonder for what purpose God saved my life after suffering from years of mental and emotional abuse and depression, after surviving a breakdown. I discovered what I thought that purpose was several years ago and it’s a revelation I wasn’t ready for. You have an undeniably powerful testimony to share.

    Comment Written 31-Jul-2006


    kintesiegel wrote,
    This is very powerful writing. It makes me sick to think of all the things that you have experienced and gotten involved in. You describe a hard road but then I see that writing is your salvation. Keep it up.

    Comment Written 30-Jul-2006


    Raquelle wrote,
    You know, no_obstacle, as I read your book I can see a very strong and determined man. The trials and tribulations you have gone thru, some men, would never have been able to handle it. With the strength and wisdom God has given you, you ARE going to beat this disease. Good Luck in your journey for a full recovery. My prayers are with you.

    Comment Written 09-Jun-2006


    richie m wrote,



    Adora Bayles wrote,

    Dear No Obstacle: Your wonderful story ought to be told to the whole world. You write well and the story is truly compelling. I wouldn’t change a thing. Thank you for the insight.

    Comment Written 29-Apr-2006


    kkholder wrote,

    First of all, I want you to know that I will not read too many book chapters… I feel unworthy jumping in the middle, so to speak. I was drawn to read this one. I am glad I did. All alone, it stands. It can be its own essay… and a good one. yes, it need a little tightening, but that is not a problem here… people can help with that. This is very unique. very wonderful. I work with kids who are ready for this type of life… this type of hell… you have presented it fairly… like.. you said… it becomes the end result of life. Yet you still try and try and try to escape. That is the nature of man. We are called by God to freedom. May I use a few sentences from this chapter when I talk to “my” kids…. like this one:

    I don’t care who you are, or how tough you think you are. Never disillusion yourself; prison will emotionally, physically and mentally cripple you in ways unimaginable. I’ve seen and participated in countless acts of barbaric violence, I did this without regret or even a hint of remorse. Just as you would cover an innocent baby in its crib with a blanket, to embrace it in its warmness. So too was the environment of prison embracing me in its own blanket.

    You are on your way to the Light… to the Truth… I can feel it.

    Comment Written 28-Apr-2006.

    Thanks in taking the time to consider my amazing real life drama. I’ve included a direct link to Rosedog,

    Mino Pavlic

  10. KingsKid07 says:

    I can testify to God’s unfailing love! I was born into an alcoholic home, but I have been given a gift from as far back as I can remember, I have had an awareness of God even as a child. I can remember the days of innocence, being amazed by God through being aware of His holy presence in His creation.
    My life’s story has been one of rebellion. I have looked for love in all the wrong places. I left home at 16, was pregnant at 17. I named my baby girl, Charity Dawn (in her little life, God’s LOVE dawned on me). She was born with a serious congenital heart defect. I didn’t know that the word charity in the old english, meant LOVE (1 Cor. 13:13), but I started to attend church during her first year of life. I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour and was baptized at the age of 18,(October 1976) and my precious daughter died after her second open heart surgery on November 13, 1976 just prior to my 19th birthday. To make the story short…..I entered into a path of rebellion against God, I was angry, I (in my ignorant state of comprehension) felt abandoned. I used alcohol to numb the pains and deal with the disappointments that life threw at me. I thought I was okay, I functioned somewhat normally, I married, had two beautiful children only to crash after a 14 year marriage, and I took off in “self will run riot” yet again, and found myself broken and entered into a women’s recovery house. I began a spiritual program of recovery. I have now been clean & sober (by the grace of God) for almost 11 years now.
    During the first 5 years of my recovery, I lost my step-father and second husband to cancer, but by God’s grace, I didn’t use any substance to cope. God gave me a most awesome gift! He gave me the strength to assist my husband through his battle against cancer, God used this situation to show His direct involvement in our lives. It was the most HOLY experience I have ever been apart of! My husband was pallitive, I cared for him at home through the whole process of his surrender and death. Three days before my husband died, he said…”when it comes to the end all that matters is our relationship with God and others, the love we give and receive is all that we leave and take.” I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that Jesus Christ was speaking with my husband while he lay dying an hour before he died. My husband was coherent through his whole process, and at one point he said outloud….”No I don’t want the water, I asked for my life back, and now you’re offering me water”! (Jesus Christ it the only one who offers us waters of everlasting life), so I know he was speaking to Christ. He went into a dialogue with Christ (I could tell by his body language that he was conversing) but I knew intuitively that I wasn’t supposed to over hear my husbands part of the conversation, I sat away and waited for about 45 minutes then went back to my husband’s side to reassure him that I was there. He said in the most clear, strong, but humble voice….”Please, give me the water”. When he said that, his eyes opened wide….and as he breathed in a slow deep breath, he was completely consumed by complete joy/ecstasy (it was holy) and as he was doing this, the smile on his face grew and grew, then he breathed out and let go and left this physical realm. He died with a smile on his face. I know that this physical exsistence is not the end! In God’s time, we will go to our real home!
    For those who accept Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour, there is a future beyond here and now!
    The story of my life is an “unfolding” and even though I have made poor choices, I have sinned over and over again, God has never left me, he has continued to work in my heart and my whole life finally crashed this year (I can relate to being broken). Yet again another failed relationship, I was fired (for the first time in my life) from my job. I dropped to my knees and cried out to God, There is so much more (I would have to write a book) to the process that has happened since April 2007….it’s amazing how God has shown his love, answered prayers and is revealing himself. His call to me is that he desires me intimately!
    No matter how broken my heart has been, no matter how badly I have believed others have betrayed me, ect….I learned that ultimately….I did those very things to GOD! It was I who have broken God’s heart, betrayed HIM, rejected HIM ect., so now in that realization, I have confessed my sins, repented and am looking to God and trusting HIM for all the answers.
    I have given him every area of my life, I am His work in progress. I AM A NEW CREATION IN CHRIST and not living as I used to, not making choices I used to, not deciding how I would live as I used to! I have been asked to help in a christian recovery house for women that is in the plans of opening. I continue to give this hope to God, that if this is the place he sets me to be a blessing to others for His glory, that this takes place.
    So please be encouraged! Accept being broken, cry out to God, open your heart, repent and mean it! God will do the work that He has planned. My sins have been like the putting on of the layers of an onion skin, my recovery & relationship with God has been like an UN-Layering of the sins as of the layers of the skins of an onion too. My spiritual process has taken 31 years (thus far), but through it I have a God given experience, strength and hope to share. Praise God, that he never fails, that what he begins in us…will come into completion. Don’t loose faith in God, He won’t fail you! Continue to “trudge the narrow path to happy destiny”.
    Remember, that what satan intends for harm, God intends for good!
    God bless you and keep you! Sincerely, in Christ, Debra

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