Very Sick and Shattered

I haven’t been here for quite a while as I have been dealing with my grandfather who was really sick last year and died before Christmas. After this I could follow up on my bowel operation as I have not recovered as I has been told I would.

My bowel function has slowed down and I have been getting dangerous blockages.

I have gone to both medical specialists here in Sydney Australia and I have undertaken natural treatment as well.

The medical doctors even though I have sort a second opinion have said the operated area has healed well with some minor scarring and as for my bowels not working properly they have just prescribed, fiber and water and laxatives.

Now I did not have this problem prior to having a cancerous bowel tumour removed. BTW I am cancer free according to my latests tests. If anything I would lean towards having frequent and very soft stools (sorry about the detail I just want you to understand I never had constipation or blockages every before).

Slowly since my operation which was almost two years ago now my bowels just got harder and harder to go to the toilet and now even with laxatives I can hardly go.

I have by the Grace of God met by chance two other women who have had a similar operation and bowel ressection done in a similar place in our large intestines. They have had similar issues and are now like me frightened of having total blokage or their bowels ceasing to work.

I have been a Christian for 31 years and faced a number of serious illnesses in the past. I would have always prayed and trusted God with my situation. I never had a miraculous healing but I have always come out of my health issues OK and found a way to manage them and get on with life.

I have prayed with Faith and I have always dealt with sin in my life appropriately. I have seen God do some changes in my life recently. I was hurt badly by my best friend (betrayed and humiliated by her) a while ago. I have been healed of this emotional hurt and I have forgiven her earlier this year. This is just an example how I have been keeping my sin in check and not falling under and KNOWN sin to ensure my prayers are not hindered.

I have I think enough Faith for prayers to be answered. However things have gone from bad to worse to even worse still and I am losing my hope.

Along with my health issues we have had our income severely cut and some financial issues (still going through them). We also have had some other problems that have been very stressful.

I have had a bad week and a dangerous week. Yesterday we had a few other things come to light putting another strain on (my husband & myself).

I do have much to Thank God for and my husband being a Saved Believer also is one of them (he has only come to the Lord just a few years ago now). However with my bowel being very bad right now and everything else I have felt abandoned by God.

I have prayed for something anything that God would do for us. Even if the Lord would just give us a Word of Comfort. Nothing the heavens have not replied to any of my prayers lately and the Holy Spirit has been super quiet. I have never experienced such a time with God. There has always in the past been something to help us get through.

I am beside myself with all this. Overwhelmed and so gutted by the situations we are facing that I have even now found it hard to pray.

Oh Lord why are you so silent.

I need my bowels to work and heal. My husband is devastated at the thought of losing me right now and I really want to stay for a while yet. I’m not that old only 49 and my health in otherways is fine just this bowel is the problem.

I don’t know what to do anymore, what to pray, how to pray. I have continued to repent in case I have done something very wrong to be so abandoned by God. Not just me I have found there are many other Christians I know who are saying the same thing it is like our prayers are not being heard by the Lord.

However I am desparate and I am not being able to just say OK it must be my time to die and I will just accept this suffering and the horrible death that will happen if my bowels are not healed.

I understand God can take me home with him whenever He wants to take me. If this is His will we need the grace to accept it but like King Hezekiah I have prayed in tears for healing and a few more years on this earth to be an encouragement not only to my husband but my brother who has just come to the Lord.

I would really appreciate your prayers.


What do YOU think?



  1. Christ Lives InMe says:

    Greetings my beloved sister in Christ

    The worst thing you can do is give up. Christ never gave up on us. When you pray believe that you have already received. Jesus said wherever two are more or gathered He will be there. He is that Big Physician in the sky that has put forth miracles all over the world EVERYDAY.
    Remember the verse ” If you just had the Faith of a mustard seed. . You can say Mountain, throw yourself into the sea, and it shall Obey you. He also said, these things He has done. Thru Him we can do them to. I claim Authority in all the things He said we can do and in thename of Jesus I command your condition to clear it self of all hinderance of your body, and throw itself ito a near by sea. I ask this in thename of Jesus. Amen

    Seek the kingdom and desire in His word.

  2. Dear Melody,

    God promised He would never leave you nor forsake you, and that nothing can separate you from His Love. He can heal you. Trust Him.

    O LORD my God, I called to you for help and you healed me. (Psalm 30:2)

    1 Praise the Lord, my soul;
    all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
    2 Praise the Lord, my soul,
    and forget not all his benefits—
    3 who forgives all your sins
    and heals all your diseases,
    4 who redeems your life from the pit
    and crowns you with love and compassion,
    5 who satisfies your desires with good things
    so that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s. (Psalm 103:1-5)

    He sent forth his word and healed them; he rescued them from the grave. (Psalm 107:20)

    God loves you and wants to bless you and heal you. He can heal you and restore you, and He can help you. Trust His promises and thank Him for healing you, even before you see it. It helps to have faith, which is a gift He can give if you ask. He wants you to be healed; Trust Him 🙂

    I will be praying for you, and know that He can heal you and He loves you.


  3. MelodyCat says:

    I have been praying scripture for this for a long while now.

    This is why I am shattered at the moment. I am in a really bad way. No improvement. No relief.

    Basically I am facing death soon if this doesn’t clear up.

    I have lost hope that I will get a miracle and I am not in a place to just say “it’s OK with me Lord if this is your Will”. I really don’t want to have my bowels stop working or worse to burst.

    I want God to heal me and I really need it now.

    I have cried so much I cannot cry anymore.

    Is this sickness demonic and attack by Satan? I don’t know.

    Is this due to some sin? I don’t know.

    I have pleaded with God to give me insight and guidance. My husband is fasting and praying for me at the moment.

    I am frightened. I am emotionally all over the place.

    Why does God remain silent?

  4. I sympathize with you. I have had feelings similar to yours at times. Even if nothing seems to be happening, trust God anyway. That’s what I tell myself. No one out there can do what He does. No one can help you like He can. You’re his child. He will not abandon you. Just believe He is working things out even if you can’t see it.

    I’m reminded of the following passage from the Book of John:

    From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him. “You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the Twelve. Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life.” John 6:66-68( NIV)

    Where else can we ourselves go when trouble comes? It’s best to stick with Jesus.

    I don’t know if you would be interested in this or not, but I thought I would give you the option.

    A man named Dr. Gary Wood was on Sid’s Roth’s “It’s Supernatural” program. I happened to hear some of his testimony, when I was watching TV at my mother’s house. Below is some information about him that I got off of Sid’s site.

    “It was medically verified that Gary Wood died. He went to heaven and saw the “body parts room” full of replacements waiting for people who need them. Gary learned how to access this, and now people are supernaturally getting new body parts in his meetings!”

    Referenced from:

    You can also go to Gary’s site and learn more information:

    I have also heard testimonies of people being healed by taking Communion, or The Lord’s Supper. But, a person must be a Christian to partake of it. Jesus calls the bread His body. Therefore, when you partake of the bread, you are taking in His body. His body was never sick. The Scriptures indicate that His body is for our healing. You can take it every day. There is no limit on how often you can partake of the Lord’s Supper. Just be sure it is done in reverence.

    Also, some healings are progressive. Other healings are instant. We call them miracles. God heals either way.

    I hope your health will improve. Just keep looking and keep seeking and keep knocking. God bless you and your family.

  5. childofjesus says:


    I will surely pray for you & for your situations from today. I do understand how you are feeling in your sick body and the thought that God has abandoned you, but you & I know that God will never forsake us. (Hebrews 13:5). You have done a right thing by forgiving your best friend. Even if the relationship does not get healed, our heart is right with the Lord. The devil has no hold on our thoughts against that person (one who hurts us), if we forgive, otherwise we end up cursing that person, everytime the devil reminds us of the hurt, which affects our relationship with the Lord.

    Take heart, God will bless you and take you out of every situation that is pulling you down at present with victory. Believe in His promises for us.

    Recently, God has put in my heart to pray claiming verses from the Bible. God said to Reinhard Bonnke (Evangelist) that “My Word in My Mouth, is as powerful as My Word in your mouth”.

    Following are the verses, I claim for healing. You can claim others too in addition to it.

    Jeremiah 33:6 – ‘Nevertheless, I will bring health and healing to it; I will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant peace and security.

    Jeremiah 31:25 – I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint.”

    Isaiah 53:5 – But he was pierced for our transgressions,
    he was crushed for our iniquities;
    the punishment that brought us peace was on him,
    and by his wounds we are healed.

    Isaiah 33:24 – No one living in Zion will say, “I am ill”;
    and the sins of those who dwell there will be forgiven.

    Isaiah 50:7 – Because the Sovereign Lord helps me,
    I will not be disgraced.
    Therefore have I set my face like flint,
    and I know I will not be put to shame.

    Luke 13:12 – When Jesus saw her, he called her forward and said to her, “Woman, you are set free from your infirmity.”

    Deutro 7:15 – The Lord will keep you free from every disease. He will not inflict on you the horrible diseases you knew in Egypt, but he will inflict them on all who hate you.

    Lamentation 3:32 – Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,so great is his unfailing love.

    1 Kings 3:14 – And if you walk in obedience to me and keep my decrees and commands as David your father did, I will give you a long life.”

    Psalm 91:16 – With long life I will satisfy him, and show him my salvation.”


    • MelodyCat says:

      My husband and I also think this is demonic as well.

      We are fasting and praying as well.

      I really appreciate your prayers.

      There have been a few things that happened during out time of prayer today that certainly indicate that it is more than just sickness.

      My husband has been doing all the praying for me but he isn’t a man gifted with insight in how to pray for these things. So your prayers are appreciated.


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