Relationship (teen) advice…

The thing I just really want from you guys and what I’d appreciate the MOST is if you guys can give me advice and help………

My girl stated that it’d be ok for us to have intercourse after 9 or 10 months. I really love her and she loves me too unconditionally, yet I feel uncomfortable about being intimate before marriage.

You see I’m a religious type of person, some ppl in high school call me “weird” for being like that, but i dnt care. During class I can be reading my bible rather than paying attention, I dnt care, i love what the bible says and what it has to offer to us. My teachers tell me to put it away, I do, but then I take it back out as soon as they don’t notice.

I just want advice on whether or not I should be intimate with her. I mean, I do love her and want to show it to her, just as she does to me.
However at the same time I have conscious and present about what the bible says about sex before marriage. I dont want to tell her “No, I dont want to do it” so she could feel rejected but at the same time I dont want to say to God “I’m going to disregard your word for a moment” so he could feel rejected either.

I DONT WANT TO REJECT ANY OF THEM.

Most of my guy friends have told me im nuts if i say no to a girl when she wants to have sex. THATS THEM…NOT ME….I WANT to be intimate, YET….ONLY AFTER MARRIAGE.

Ive received oral sex from her and TRUST ME…i regreted it and repented of it, YET I too feel it’s our way of “showing” our love. I.D.K. I know it’s wrong but when I get it it feels good, but after I go home, I feel bad for having received that.

I don’t want to tell her NO about sex, b/c I dont want her leaving me, so idk if i should do it with her. AND i dont want to reject God for a lustful moment either.

I guess…I’m just confused.

Any advice, help, suggestions, prayers, would be GREATLY APPRECIATED.

Thank you all and God bless you fo having taking time to help.

What do YOU think?

comments

Comments

  1. imrachel says:

    im a teenager too. my boyfriend is really crazy about me (in love), like how you are crazy about your girlfriend, (: he was thinking about having sex with me during high school, but i stopped right there. since you read the bible, sex should be after marriage. thats true. at that time my boyfriend didnt really pay attention to God’s teachings. hes catholic its just that his mom & stepdad dont really go to church. but now, im proud that hes reading the bible & he understand our talk about having sex (:

    but have you ever encourgaged your gf to listen to God’s words? God likes it when one person spreads his word to another. (: you should also have a talk with your gf about having sex. to me you should tell her to take sex after marriage because thats what you want to do & you dont want it to affect your life & your lustful relationship with God. you should do that instead of saying striaght to her no i dont want to have sex with you right now. she will feel rejected.

    dont forget, dont put your girlfriend first. God should be first he shouldnt be out of the circle. just reminding you (: i will pray for you. i hope this is helpful..(:

    God bless..
    -Rachel

  2. samuel85nb says:

    I Understand that you are really in love. I am too. Im like 26 this year and i would say that me and My GF are kindda Godly people. That is the reason we have not made love yet. I wouldn’t want sin to creep into my life thus destroying my love for her. Premarital sex, oral sex- any of this before marriage is wrong as it is a SIN. If you allow this to happen again, unfortunately, you will indirectly allow other sins to enter your life. This could potentialy destroy your relationship with her and i would suggest that you stop all this if you truelly love her.

    I know this it might hurt, but sometimes this hurts are good for us on the long run. Just to let u feel better, i am still working on becoming a better me. It hurts me not to be able to make love to the one you love, yet we have to, because we have to live a life of priciples. I’m not perfect as i still suffer with other sexual related sins exp : masturbation. I tend to think that it is ok as it is a way to keep my hormones controlled. But a sin is a sin. i have to work on this matters and i hope we all could pray for strong will power to ressist.

  3. I engaged in pre-marital sex before I was saved,and I wish I had not.I believe anybody who has had sex outside of marriage would say the same.I also believe that if they didn’t, they are lying. God isn’t against sex, none of us would be here without it.It is meant to be a wonderful expression of love and intimacy.What happens when you don’t wait is that you lose pieces of yourself.You lose the ability to be truly intimate with someone. I have had to have emotional healing and have spent years of my married life learning how to be truly intimate,and to understand the gift that sex really is. God’s way is the best way!He wants you to have an awesome sex life,just after you have entered into a covenant of marriage. Hope this helps!
    Kristin

  4. Revelation 21:8 

    8 But the cowardly, unbelieving,[a] abominable, murderers, sexually immoral, sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death

    When people ask me about questions like this,I let the word speak load and clear.Jesus spoke so much about being sexualley pure and what would happen to those sexualley immoral people………………

  5. If a boyfriend/girlfriend really expects a sexual relationship before marriage then they don't respect God, themselves or their partner properly.

    You make the lifelong binding commitment of marriage BEFORE having sexual intimacy or you are messing up your life and damaging yourself and your partner.

    God takes these things seriously. The western world nowadays is totally at odds with God on this issue, but "the world" is an enemy of our soul, according to the Bible. We are supposed to be crucified to the world, and the world to us.

    Indulging in pre-marital sex is a way to DESTROY a relationship that could have been really great. Its a way to damage your capacity to enjoy sex in marriage. Its a way to get demons into you. You can be forgiven if you repent, but the scars are likely to remain. God is not mocked. Whatever you sow, you reap.

    When a person wilfully sins, they open themselves up to the possibility that they may not WISH to repent in the future. That is really scary.

    Flee immorality. Its a KILLER. Just because some people survive shark attacks does not mean its good to swim with the sharks.

    • bornagainbytheblood says:

      Michael said it very well. What’s more, peer pressure is tough, but dare to be a Daniel. Stand tall, and on the Word of God. People may mock you, but be exceedingly glad as you stand for Christ Jesus amongst this wicked and perverse generation. By taking a firm stance against sin, you will offer up a great testimony that can have a real impact on some of your peers.

      1 Corinthians 6:18 – Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that commiteth fornication sinneth against his own body.

      Lastly, I would also advise focusing on your studies while in class, as this would be pleasing to Jesus; however, you could study your Bible before, after and between classes.

  6. Joshuagm1991 says:

    What’s up! I really commend you on posting and asking for help and prayers. I will say a prayer for your deliverance.

    A couple things come to mind.

    First: We know the God says he is the alpha and omega. We are truly blessed to be made FOR God and to be temples for Christ. Rejecting your girlfriend for Christ isn’t really so bad.

    – Ponder that for the second. The alpha and omega of the universe wants to reside in your body as a temple. REVERENCE!

    Second: We know that God says the sexual immoral will have their place in the lake of fire.

    Repent, for the kingdom of God is near.

    Don’t want to scare you…
    In much love and Jesus,
    Joshua

  7. My best advice is to break off the relationship. The truth is that she probably isn’t the one if she’s pressuring you that way. I don’t want to sound harsh at all but chances are that God doesn’t want you to be in this relationship. God’s plan will never involve sexual immorality.

    I’m praying for ya man! I’m 19 so I’m not very far removed from the pressures of high school and can understand the feelings that you’re having. I have faith that God will allow you to make the right choice in this matter. Stay strong in Christ! You’ll be glad you did later in life.

    Your Brother in Christ,

    Trevor

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