Needing help

I have recently recommited my life to Christ, as I fell away from my faith for a few years. I have struggled with health issues, anxiety and anger, and a few months ago seperated from my husband due to his alcoholism. He was not a Christian.

In the past 3 months, he has gone through treatment, has been sober for 90 days, and started attending church, and I believe he is close to making the decision to be born again in Christ.

I am struggling with making a decision on whether we can reconcile and be a family again (we also have 3 children). I still have issues with anger, hurt, resentment, and trust in regards to our relationship. I have been praying that Jesus will lead me to the right decision and allow my heart to forgive.

To add to this, there is also a man who has shown interest in me during this time of seperation from my husband, and has been very caring, kind and there for me emotionally. Logically I know that this is a sin, that I am committing adultry by allowing myself to be emotionally involved with this man, I am having a very hard time cutting ties with him. I have prayed and prayed for help in this matter, but somehow I keep getting sucked back in.

Can anyone offer any advice, or scripture so that I can free myself of this sin and also are there specific prayers that will help with both situations?

What do YOU think?



  1. Dear snkarpowicz

    I feel compelled to write to you as I have/am going through a divorce of my own.
    Moses’ law was that we could divorce for reasons you state, BUT see what Jesus says below.

    Mar 10:2 And some Pharisees came up, and, in order to test Him and try to find a weakness in Him, asked, Is it lawful for a man to dismiss and repudiate and divorce his wife?
    Mar 10:3 He answered them, What did Moses command you?
    Mar 10:4 They replied, Moses allowed a man to write a bill of divorce and to put her away. [Deut. 24:1-4.]
    Mar 10:5 But Jesus said to them, Because of your hardness of heart [your condition of insensibility to the call of God] he wrote you this precept in your Law.
    Mar 10:6 But from the beginning of creation God made them male and female. [Gen. 1:27; 5:2.]
    Mar 10:7 For this reason a man shall leave [behind] his father and his mother and be joined to his wife and cleave closely to her permanently,
    Mar 10:8 And the two shall become one flesh, so that they are no longer two, but one flesh. [Gen. 2:24.]
    Mar 10:9 What therefore God has united (joined together), let not man separate or divide.
    Mar 10:10 And indoors the disciples questioned Him again about this subject.
    Mar 10:11 And He said to them, Whoever dismisses (repudiates and divorces) his wife and marries another commits adultery against her;
    Mar 10:12 And if a woman dismisses (repudiates and divorces) her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.

    Initially the question was about ‘divorce’ but Jesus’ answer combined divorce with remarriage, because that is the obvious path.
    Both Michael and Redbuck have given there opinions on the topic ‘Life after Divorce’ that I had posted.

    Maybe there are conditions acceptable to God. Are you prepared to take that chance and be forever damned if you are wrong?
    I often share this with my ‘soon to be’ exwife and her friend, not to win her back, but because I don’t want her or him to be cast into the flames of Hell. I am of course talking about if she remarries, which they are planning.
    Never mind who was to blame.

    Will you want to remarry? If you do this is adultery.
    Forget this temptation from Satan, as Beloved mentioned, this admirer. Who says he will not do something worse to you. Better the ‘devil’ you know than the ‘devil’ you don’t know.

    Try to get to see the movie, ‘Fireproof’, and work it out from there.
    Draw close to the Lord and be blessed by being in His will.

    Jesus loves you.

  2. “For our struggle is not against flesh and blood,but against the rulers ,against the authorities,against the the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” Ephesians 6:12
    It sounds as if the Lord is working on you and your husband.I would suggest that you continue to devote yourself to this work.Don’t give in to the temptation Satan has placed in your path.( The man who has shown interest in you) You are in a very vulnerable time in your life.It would be so easy to become entangled with someone who seems to ease your burdens,and patch up your
    wounds. But that is our Lords job! Yield yourself to Him,study His Word and be patient. Don’t take the enemy’s bait,it might be easier,and give you a quick fix for the issues you are facing right now,but it wouldn’t last.God has a wonderful plan for your life! Imagine your emotions healed,your husband saved and being the kind of husband and father he should be.Your family intact!God hates divorce,because He knows how destructive it is,how much is hurts everyone involved,especially children.You are in a spiritual battle right now! It is not even about the things you can see and feel so much,as it is the evil influences behind the behavior.You have authority over such things as a believer! Take a stand against this assault! James4:7-8 “Submit yourself then,to God.Resist the devil,and he will flee from you.Come near to God and He will come near to you.”
    A scripture I have clung to in difficult times is Jeremiah 23:11- “For I know the plans I have for you,”declares the Lord,” plans to prosper you and not to harm you,plans to give you a hope and a future.”
    There are a lot of great teachings on this site regarding spiritual warfare,as well as testimonies of victories in other believers lives.
    I hope this helps,I will lift you and your family up in prayer.

    • snkarpowicz says:

      Thank you so much for the helpful scriptures. I do feel like I am under spiritual attack. I have asked for prayer from my Pastor and church and I appreciate you praying for my family.

      Would it be helpful to request to be anointed with oil for protection? I am feeling like I am undergoing a very difficult battle. I am praying and reading the Bible and I don’t feel like Jesus is with me or speaking to me. I feel very alone and scared.

      • I believe that being anointed with oil while being prayed for would be fine.Ask to be strengthened in your inner man,and ask for protection.
        You mentioned not feeling Jesus with you. We must never let our feelings outweigh the Word of God.Jesus said He would Never leave you nor forsake you.You must have faith that He is with you.He is!! As far as hearing from our Lord,let the scriptures speak to you,they are one in the same.
        Make sure to walk in forgiveness. That is also something you may not “feel” like you can do,so just make it an act of your will to forgive you husband.
        Remember, you aren’t alone.You have done very well to reach out to your church and pastor,and other believers for help.You can private message me anytime to vent,ask for prayer,or just for a listening ear. 🙂
        Do keep in touch!
        Your sister in the Lord, Beloved

        I will continue to pray for you,and your family.

  3. Joshuagm1991 says:

    Hello there,

    Falling away was a mistake, and we have consequences because The Lord isn’t pleased with us. However, I pray these experiences being you closer to him.

    Zechariah 13:9
    This third I will bring into the fire; I will refine them like silver and test them like gold. They will call on my name and I will answer them; I will say, ‘They are my people,’ and they will say, ‘The LORD is our God.'”

    We do have a Helper, the Holy Spirit. Listen to what your conscience says, you will probably have to cut it off with your new guy. The Lord understands that it is hard, but we are to cut off anything that is causing us to sin.

    The Lord is with us in tough times. The Lord’s power in us is actually made stronger when we are in long-suffering.

    2 Corinthians 12:9
    But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

    God bless you and just trust in the Lord.
    I’ll pray for doors to be opened for you.

    In Yeshua with love,

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