The Power of Your Testimony

I have always believed in Jesus, but in my childhood, I would never spend any time praying or reading scripture, I use to spend most of my day watching TV or playing video games which was laziness in every aspect including spiritually. I was addicted to sexual pleasures of the flesh for years. The ways of wrong were in my daily activity. I was disrespectful to my parents. In my speech filth and profanity. I did not have the Lord in my life. When I was nineteen, a serious revelation in my Commitment to God occurred, I realized that I wanted a stronger relationship with my God, I at first was crushed emotionally thinking it was to late to develop a deep relationship with God. I viewed my self as such a wretched sinner, I wondered would God forgive me. I hated the actions I committed in my past . My spirit was crushed, godly sorrows flooded my heart, but then it hit me, God's mercy is everlasting. I cried out to the Lord, asking him for a heart of flesh, soon after things changed. a deep love for God developed, through the scriptures getting to know God and our Lord Jesus Christ. I developed hatred of sin in my daily life. I am in no way perfect but through Christ which strengthens me, I sin much less and stay away from things of the flesh, and am spiritually minded. I have by the mercy of our loving God been reborn. I want to help others know truth, I am forever humbled that God's grace came upon me.
THANK God our heavenly father for our savior and Lord Jesus Christ

2 Corinthians 7: For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of ….
Ezekiel 36: 26

A new heart also will I give you, and new spirit will I put within you: and I will take away the stony heart out of your flesh, and I will give you a heart of flesh

2 Corinthians 4: 6

For God, who commanded the light to shine out of darkness, hath shined in our hearts, to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.

From Hatred to Freedom - Testimony of Former gangster Rasmus

As my past as a professional criminal and gangster has been very violent, full of betrayals, lies, broken human relationships, folks have tried to kill me on many occasions, I have been tortured, my close friends have been killed and what ever evil things you could ever imagine, all of that has been part of my life in a very fierceful way. Also the things I have been doing to others and how much I have hurt and wounded many folks in many ways. There is a lot of blood in my hands. I can't undo things that have been done, how ever much I'd desire to do so. Due to these things I have had to deal with the matter of forgiveness from all the different points very deeply. I have had to forgive others and also to forgive myself and to find a real mercy of God and reconciliation with Him. When my life changed through the power of God as I got born again 10 years ago and I started to adapt myself to a normal living, I quickly noticed that you don't have to be a criminal in order to experience in life, how often one might get offended or wounded and how often oneself hurts and wounds the others, to the most part in such a way that it is unintentional. I would like to share my own testimony with you concerning this area. I believe that If you have strength to read this text and you read it thinking over what it is saying and that you will dwell on these things, your life is going to change for sure. It is through these thoughts that I have been able to forgive all those folks how have hurt me in one way or another, I do mean what I am saying, I can tell you today, that I love those folks who have tortured me, tried to kill me and how they have killed my close friends. When it comes to forgiveness, it is not about a feeling – It is one's own choice. Remember this to begin with.

If we say that we have forgiven someone, but were are yet not willing to meet that particular person anymore, we have omitted the phone number of that person from you cell phone or when we see that particular person we are avoiding him or her and try to hide from that person, I can tell you, that we haven't forgiven that person from the bottom of our hearts. I have heard my teachings on the topic of forgiveness and I have noticed, that the topic can be dealt with from very many sides and in many ways. My personal experience is, that when it comes to forgiveness, it has to be 100% and absolute. It is not forgiveness to say, "I forgive you, but I'll never forget what you did to me" or "I forgive you but I will never ever want to spend time with you". I just want to mention, that each folks have the potential to forgive to a certain degree. But there is forgiveness, where we need God's strength and help.

Someone might ask: "what does it matter, if I do not forgive, are you not aware of what that person has done to me.." I know what it is that is going to happen to you unless you forgive and how much you will lose in life when you cling to your unforgiveness. There are certain conformities to the law that regard every human being regardless of what their religion, skin color, age, prosperity, success is. These conformities to the law are set by God and all of them can be found in the Bible. Many times we are applying certain adherences to the law in life without understanding them to be the truths of the Word of God. Many teachings that are as a basis for the nowaday teaching of how to be succesful in this world, in your own life, in every are whatsoever and almost without any borders. Those principles have their origin in the Word of God and therefore they work on everyone who is applying those conformities to the law in practical way. One might succeed in life using certain principles and conformities to the law. You might get peace, joy, be succesful financially and even be better off in every way, what comes to your physical and mental well-being. All of that is good, if we only remember that whatsoever whosoever insists or is teaching, a real success can only be found through a personal relationship with God.

Bible is telling us that no-one can know God better than through Jesus Christ. Your relationship with God is based on that single truth, that Jesus Christ died on the cross for our sins. When we believe that and when we ask Jesus to be the Lord of our life, we'll become God's children. Without this truth we cannot be in contact with a real God, who has created the Heaven, the Earth and every human being. Each human being whom God has created is going to one day stand before Him. As you apply some principles of success in your life, do remember, that the success of this world is temporary. Let some wise, learned and rich folks tell it some other way, but the truth is according to the Word of God, that we live our lives through upon this earth and then when we die, each one of us have to make account of our lives before God. Therefore study what the Word of God is telling and seek the truth therein. Know, in whom you believe and who are you being supported by, as that is the only thing that matters, when it is time for us to leave this world.

Somebody are congratulating me for changing a "wretched" life to a good life. It is quite right, but I just want to tell you, that if we are measuring our happiness in money, fame, others appreciating us and in the things that this world is offering us. I had all of that what you could imagine, if the success is being measured according to those things. I don't even want to mention what kind of sums of money are mentioned in the criminal circles. Many of you would certainly not believe if I were to mention the names of some folks who are well known and who are somewhat entangled with those particular things. Decision makers, representatives of the office, rich people, famous and well known folks... The reason that got me out of there, was not misery but Jesus appering to me and beginning to address me audiably. Believe me or not, I wouldn't have liked to leave that lifestyle, money and all of that. I wouldn't have left it, unless Jesus, who became so real to me did finally tell me: "Rami, you have to choose now, life or death. If you choose to live your life like this, you are going to die very soon and your are going to die in your sins..." After that, I was shown, how I died. I was clearly shown, how I was leaving a Casino together with my friend. As we walked out, a car drove in front of us and we where shot from that particular car with machine weapons. I saw all of that, as if I would have been watching a movie. As I saw myself and my friend laying in the pool of blood, Jesus said "this is how your life is going to end, if you choose wrong. What does it then benefit you all you money and all the other things that you possess... "I gave my life to Jesus finally because of that. Did Jesus frighten me with Hell.. no he didn't frighten me. In His great mercy he showed me these things, as he knew very well, that I would otherwise make a wrong choice.

I cannot explain why Jesus met me in this way ... I have been pondering upon it many times, especially when I have seen some of my friends to lose their lives or destroy their lives. You'd better remember still, that you don't have to be a criminal in order to be able to destroy your life.

You might be rich, famous and to have a really good success and finally destroy your whole life. Even so, that no-one else, not even your spouse, knows what you really feel like. There are times in the lives of each one of us, when Jesus is calling us to salvation. Often we kind of sense some kind of emptiness or something else in our hearts. Most folks do not realise what such feelings and states of being are due to. I alway knew, when God was calling me, as I was a child of a home of believers and I understood about spiritual matters. When God was calling me once in a while, I to a most part arranged big parties that could go on for several days. Amidst all of such partying it was easier for me to do away with the unpleasant feelings of emptiness within myself and also that quiet voice of God.

I just would like to revert back to the topic that I started with and to tell my own testimony concerning forgiving and the importance thereof. As I mentioned in the beginning, I have had to deal with the topic due to my own experiences. As I got born again and left a criminal way of living, so inspite of that, I hated some folks. I had been delivered from being violent, but I was battling all the time with the emotions of hatred and revenge.

I had a friend, who was one of my closest friends. We were excercising the Marshal Arts together, I taught him and we were traininig a lot for years. He obtained a World Championship in a certain Genre of Marshal Arts. He was a criminal like myself and he belong to my close circle. During the years he begun to envy me from the bottom of his heart and finally he betrayed me through making a deal with the cops. This friend of mine put up a trap for me and as a result of that I received a prison sentence of 4 years. I perceived straight away who had betrayed me. As I was in prison, I thought for myself, that when the time is right, I will revenge on him and he is going to pay for his betrayal with his own life. Then, when I got saved, I decided that he is going to live. I thought that I was very "devout" as I acted so. I even thought that I would please God.. Finally I got released from the prison. That particular friend of mine was sure, that he wouldn't live for much longer after I was released from the prison. There were not many, who believed in that I was saved, but thought it to be pure lie.

Some time passed by and I was going to a big christian meeting. I got to the place of the meeting and as I walked in through the door, I was caught with horror and panic. I couldn't remain at the place of the meeting but took off and started to suddenly drive back home. While driving, I pondered why I felt so.. Suddenly Jesus started to talk to me and he was using such certain terms, that I stopped the car by the wayside. Jesus told me the name of my friend. I told him straight away, that I had forgiven what my friend did then. Then Jesus answered and said: "All right, if you have forgiven you friend, call him and invite him to come with you to the meeting" There was a certain world renowned lady evangelist talking in that christian meeting and I had been waiting for a long time, that when she would come, then I would attend her meeting, in order for her to pray for me. I really wanted to go there. But now I had got a problem, the Lord urged me to invite somebody to come to the meeting together with me, a person because of whom I had been prison inmate for 2 years and out of that time 5 months in a little cell, that was just a little larger than 2 meters long and the width was the same. I felt how there was hatred and bitterness toward that person in my heart.. To put in straight terms, I would have had a desire to harm him in a way, that he would get some kind of punishment for what he did.

While sitting there in my car, I really fought in my heart concerning what would i do. Finally I grapped the cell phone and called that particular friend. I told him that I would like to meet him immediately and that I would invite him to come with me to a christian meeting. He promised to come to the place we agreed on. I drove to that place and there were many folks together with him. I really had conflicting feelings in my mind. My thought were racing and it was really difficult for me to keep the hatred within me. I saw that everybody present in that place sensed an atmosphere of excitement and unease. I looked at my friend and I saw fear in his eyes. He was wearing a long leather jacket and I knew that he would certainly have a gun. We shaked hands and I asked him to step into the car. All that we spoke during our journey to the place where the meeting was, were mere words. We both knew what had happened and what kind of relationship we had between ourselves. I was thinking in my mind, how this evening would finally end.

When we arrived to the meeting place and went to the rear part of the hall. God once again started to address me. I saw how God had forgiven my big sins, transgressions and all of that. I saw Jesus Christ and Him crucified for my transgressions. The Lord asked me: "Rami, would you like to forgive your friend as I have forgiven you. Do you want to have mercy on him, as I have had mercy on you?" I told Him: "Lord, I forgive Him everything". At the same time a started to feel how supernatural love towards that friend started to fill me up. I started talking to him and he certainly noticed a change in me .. the atmosphere began to change around us ... such an inexpressible presence of freedom..

We went out for a moment to have a chat and when we returned, that particular lady evangelist was just about to begin with ministering to people through prayer. We looked how a queue of hundreds of people had gathered together around the huge hall. I thought for myself that If we were to join the end of the queue, it would take whole night prior it is my turn to be ministered to.. I told my friend that I would like to join the queu and he followed me. As we were standing there in the queue with only some folks behind us, that particular lady evangelist started to head towards us, she went around the whole queue and came straight up to us. She laid her hand on me and at the same time the power of the Holy Spirit touched me and I began to fall down. Friend of mine, who was standing right behind me took hold of me. In that moment God completely delivered me from hatred, bitterness and getting offended, what I had felt towards that person. And not only him, but also all the others who had somewhat treated me wrong. I got delivered from hatred also towards them, who had tried to kill me, tortured me, them who had killed some of my friends. Hatred and the bitterness were removed from my heart regardless of what somebody had done to me or how badly they had offended me, hurt me or wounded me.

As a result of me forgiving one person from the bottom of my heart, was God delivering me from all hatred and bitterness that I had toward different people and what is even more special, God gave me love towards those people!! Now you are saying "Do not tell a lie"... You know what, unless I had get delivered from hatred and bitterness and having received love instead of that, my life would have slid back to the criminal world. I wouldn't have had strength to resist the temptations that I have confronted after that.

As we were driving back from that meeting, I told to my friend that I know what he has done. I told him what had happened and how I felt now.. Finally I told him, that I will forgive you everything. He couldn't provide me with any answer. He told me later on, that he had been thinking the whole evening that today he would be killed and his life would expire. He told that he had a loaded a very powerful pistol in his chest pocket during the whole evening also then when he grapped me as I was falling down in the prayer line, as the Holy Spirit touched me.

Today I am free from hatred and bitterness. Of course there is a another side of the matters and that is what I have done to other folks. I have had to go through that side very deeply, that I have could and been able to forgive myself from the bottom of my heart all of that, what I have done to others. I have hurt others a thousand times more what anyone ever has hurt me. You know, sometimes it is easier to forgive others than to forgive yourself. That particular friend that I just mentioned here in my testimony doesn't keep contact with me today. Not, that he would be afraid of me anymore, but because he hasn't been able to forgive himself wholeheartedly, that what he did. I forgave, but he couldn't receive it..

It is the same with many of us, we know, that God has forgiven us our sins. He let Jesus Christ to die for us at Cross, for our sins and transgressions. Yet it is not easy for us to accept it many times, it is difficult to forgive onself. Yet what comes to God we have already been atoned for. We just have to confess and accept that. I believe that I am going to pretty shortly to put up a teaching to my Blog, a teaching that deals with forgiveness from different sides according to the Word of God. I believe that it is going to be a help and blessing to many. I hope that this little testimony of mine would bring about us just for a moment to study the relationship we have with our friends.. maybe you've got a friend who needs to hear from you "I forgive you..."

"Rasmus" Rami Kivisalo
www.myspace.com/rasmusking11

Testimony of Former Gangster

I am Rami Kivisalo, a former professional criminal, gangster, drug dealer, weapon dealer and everything you could ever imagine. To put it bluntly, I was a very sinful person, full of all kinds of evil. I would like to share my testimony with you, how my life changed years ago, through God's power, while I was in prison. This is a genuine testimony concerning things that have happened for real. I would like to encourage, through this testimony, everyone who is reading this. It really doesn't matter who you are, I would like to share my testimony with you and to encourage you. When we come into such a situation in our lives, were nobody can help us or solve our problems, I would like to tell you: Do not give up, there is still hope! What ever the matter or the situation in you life might be. All is well! The Best is yet to come!!

When I was 12-years old, I started to get interested in marshal arts. I had my first boxingssack and I began weightlifting. A few years later, my parents moved to Tanzania for work and I had to go with them. There I got to know one of the best African teachers in marshal arts. He started to teach me Kungfu, Karate and Tae Kwon Do.

These things soon became the most important things in my life and they took me over completely. Because I had completed the Senior Grade, I used all the days from morning until evening training in Marshal Arts. We trained really hard and when we returned back to Finland two years later, I had reached the highest level, having black-belts in three different disciplines of Marshal Arts. I had gone so deep into marshal arts that I had opened myself to the spirits of violence. They made me very violent and dangerous. I stopped going to school due to continuous fights in the streets.

I got acquainted with many professional criminals. Because I was very violent, I got rapid appreciation and I was finally involved in all kinds of criminal stuff. I started to create international relationships to criminals and very soon I had dealings with Mafia. Everything became lawful and normal to me, I didn't care about anything else. Still nothing in this world could give me real satisfaction. I drunk alcohol much more and took more risks. Many times I was near death but miraculously I didn't die.

The first day of 1997 the Police captured me. I got a four year prison sentence. While in jail, I was full of hatred and bitterness. Even though I knew I deserved a prison sentence of more than 10 years, I was still bitter. I realized that I would never be able to build a normal, peaceful life and change my lifestyle.

Something that no human could make whole again, had broken inside of me. From prison I started to plan bigger and bigger international criminal businesses. I had accepted that prison would be the place where I would spend many years afterwards also.

One day something, that stopped me, happened. Suddenly in the middle of the day somebody told me: Rami, unless you turn away from your bad ways and repent of your sins, you will die soon and die in your sins. I knew immediately that Jesus had spoken to me. After this Jesus called me everyday and drew me to Himself. I tried to escape His call, but after a few months, my back was against the wall. One day I knew in my heart that now I have to decide what I am going to answer to Jesus who had called me to salvation for months.

I made my decision and dropped to my knees in my cell and said, "Jesus, if you can forgive me my great sins and change my life, I will give my whole life to you. Forgive me of my sins". After this I stopped my criminal businesses and told some of my friends that I do not practice them anymore. Even though I had made my decision, I was not well. Satan pressed me and I felt that somebody inside of me was trying to get me back to my old life.

Few months after this I got vacation from prison and I went to my parents place and asked them if they could pray with other believers for me that I would be delivered of the things that made me feel troubled and pressed. So my parents along with one believing woman laid their hands on me and started to pray that Jesus would set me free from demons. They commanded Satan to depart from my life in Jesus name. Suddenly the power of Jesus came over me and I fell to the ground and I got free from all bondages in my life. After this, I started to experience freedom that I had not felt before in my life.

I was free from violence and all criminal stuff that had bound me for years. One Year after this I got released from prison. Adjusting to normal life was not easy for me. I have had many hard times since that and sometimes I have felt that I can't go on but Jesus has always given me a new power to arise and go on. Jesus never leaves or rejects a person who comes to Him. I'm thankful to Jesus for what He has done for me. Jesus came to the most failed and sinful man?s prison cell and gave me new life.

I know that there is no one who is such a big sinner, that Jesus could not help that person. He can help and He wants to help and save everyone. That was the reason why Jesus came and died on the cross for all of us. The Bible promises that everyone who calls on the name of the Lord shall be saved. (Acts. 2:21)

It is not possible for me to share here concerning all the miracles and God's supernatural protection in my life that I have experienced, but I am going to share one very wonderful experience, in order for us to be able to understand what it feels like when a human being leaves this physical body and dies. I have experienced how my spirit has left my body and I have died and returned back to my body. Something happened to me, that caused it, but I am not going to share it here. I remember that prior to my spirit leaving my body, I was laying down in the ground and I felt like I was from top to bottom covered with sweat and I felt really hot. Suddenly I didn't feel anymore pain or agony.

I was looking at myself and I saw how I was laying on the ground without moving, I looked into my own eyes and I wondered why I was staring at one place, I thought to myself, that now I am in very bad shape. I remember how some folks who were very close to me arrived in that spot and they found me. I watched how they were touching me and the other one of them cried out: "Rami is cold as ice! He doesn't breath anymore!" I remember how I suddenly returned back into my body and started breathing again. Before my spirit left my body, I remember that I felt very hot and I was perspiring throughout my whole body. During that whole time period, I didn't cease from thinking or remembering things. . yet I didn?t understand that I was practically dead.

If someone thinks, that when a human being dies, that person doesn't know anything and that everything is over, I can tell you based on my own experience - you don't even know that you have died, when it happens, you won't cease to exist or just disappear. Death is not an end. It is the end of your physical body, but a real man isn't the physical body. Man has got a spirit, soul and body. It is God's great grace, that I am alive. I shouldn't be, as death has been more than close to me on various other occasions.

Many folks who hear my testimony or read concerning my life, tell me: "It was a very good thing for you, how God has helped you and all those miracles that have happened to you.." However, I just want to tell everybody, that it doesn't matter at all how good or bad folks have been, if Jesus Christ is the Lord of our lives and our personal Saviour. Each one of us has to make a personal decision and to confess our sins, whether they are little or big things and to ask Jesus to become the Lord of ones own life.

The Bible is telling us in (John 3:16-17) "For God so loved the World that he gave his only begotten Son, so that whosoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life. For God didn't send his Son into the World to judge it, but that the World would be saved through him". We will get saved only by faith in Jesus Christ, not through our own works. I know that I have committed a lot of sin and wrong. However I need to live close to God on a daily basis. The same as the drugdeals, robberies, violence and murders are sin and are things to be judged, the same we have to repent of our lies, evil thoughts, evil speeches, our lusts, all of our sexual sins, our fornications etc.. It is easy to pay attention to big mistakes and to be blind to less things, that are also wrong in God's eyes. Remember, that everything we keep in secret, it has power over our lives.

We are getting saved by God's grace, when we believe, that Jesus bore our sins on our behalf and that He rose again from the dead through God's power and He lives today. Yet we cannot practice or approve of any kind of conscious sin in our lives, a conscious approval of sin and practicing it consciously separates us from God, although we would believe in Jesus and in that what He has done for us. You can believe in God and be very much aware of the spiritual matters, but don't let the goodness of God deceive you. God is a God of mercy, but he doesn't approve of sin, whether it is big or little sin.

Many folks are being shocked or made angry, when such a person like myself, who has such an evil past and full of sin, admonishes to repent of even the minor sins. My testimony is an encouragement concerning what God can do for a human being. It is an encouragement for each one of us, whether you are a killer, drug dealer, murderer, terrorist, prostitute, a thief, a cheat or how ever of a sinful person, I would like to tell you, that Jesus came into the world just for you, He died on a cross and bore your big sins, You can be delivered and live!! I have also an encouragement for you, those who are attending the Church and who are wishing many blessings to your fellowmen. Maybe God has blessed your life in one way or another, you might be rich, famous, or a person who has had success in some area. Folks would like to be your friend or they are envying you... and in spite of all of your blessings, you might be addicted to various kinds of addictions: like pornography, lying, cheating on your partner, lusting after things that are none of your business or you are stuck with another kind of bondage. If Jesus can set free a big sinner and criminal. He can also deliver you and give you power to put away your smallest sin.

In God's eyes sin is sin and all manner of conscious sin separates man from God, remember that, while you are reading this. It is a different matter, if you experience weakness and you fall in some areas of your life, when you are asking for forgiveness from the bottom of your heart, God does forgive you. But do not tolerate sin in your life, how ever small a matter it might be and it might feel so minor. The moment we approve of living in a conscious sin in some area of our life and thinking at the same time, that God does forgive us, we have gone astray. God doesn't accept a conscious sin in anybody's life. Sin must be confessed and one must repent from that, how ever little or big the matter might be.

God, who delivered me from my big sins, has awaken me from the dead and has given me a new life. He forgives you and sets you free, whoever you might be, a small sinner or big sinner. God's grace is power to live right and free from all bondage of the sin, what ever kind they might be. I just want to say, in conclusion, that I am not here to judge anybody. You might have got upset due to something that you read or you do not believe any of what I have told you. I love you! I do not judge you or accuse you. The Word of God says that anybody who does not believe in Jesus Christ, has already been judged. Jesus died, in order for us to get free from judgment and hell. Believe in Him. Each one of us has to choose either life or death. We have a free will. We ourselves decide what we choose. We are not perfect, only Jesus is perfect, but Bible tells, 1. John. 1:7 " But if we walk in the light as he himself is in the light, we have fellowship with one another and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin. 1:8 If we say we do not bear the guilt of sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. 1:9 But if we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous, forgiving us our sins and cleansing us from all unrighteousness. 1:10 If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar and his word is not in us".

It is my prayer that this testimony will encourage you and give you hope and will bring about change. Whoever you are, I have called you my friend, I want to share my testimony with you. I want you to have good things. I want your life to be changed! Tomorrow might be a better day, regardless of how bad or good things are right now.

Rami "Rasmus" Kivisalo
www.mysapace.com/rasmusking11