Jacob Bursavich

My name is Jacob, and I have a story. It begins in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, where I grew up. I was a good kid, I made straight A's and had many friends, but things somehow just got bad. I began to have serious fights with my family members, punching holes in the walls, breaking down doors (all that while trying to catch/fight my brothers). On top of all that I was running away, breaking into cars and houses. I would leave through my window at night and not come back till mid-morning. I was not necessarily on the "right track". I tried to sell some of the cell phones I had heisted at school, but was caught and had to leave the school. To top it off, my mom found a stash of phones in my room and.to put a long story short, I became a 12-year-old juvenile delinquent. Luckily, I got out of that situation without having to go to any detentions, however I did go to a facility type place.sort of a "rehab" for a little while. I went to a new school after I was released from the "rehab" place. Which was not very good, but it is not the topic of my story, so I think I will warp ahead a few years. Now I made it to high school. I began to sell drugs. To use drugs. I got in some fights. I was the "main dealer" at my school. I began to slip with my real life, and night life. I would go out and party, use many different drugs. Ecstasy was a favorite, while I do have some wild memories of when I was tripping on acid. Also speed, volume, any pills, etc. etc.. whatever. And weed wasn't really a "Drug", I use to smoke weed like people smoke cigarettes, and that doesn't even really explain how much or how deep I had gotten.not nearly. Things were getting bad, anyway. I was getting into too many fights, and had already had to leave that high school and was enrolled in another high school. Drugs, violence, and partying seemed to rule my life as I look back, however, those things were not what I was looking for.they seemed to find me. These problems were not the answer to any of my questions, but they felt better than any answer I seemed to get, I suppose.now that I look back. Well, back to the story. I'm 15 now, been arrested for battery charge recently, which will soon tie into this story, well.one day, I'm high and not really all together, and my friends have dropped me off at the store to steal some Triple-C, which is a drug we used to take.its not really good for you, it kills your liver, but we didn't care, so I get the pills and then I go start taking stuff off the racks and just stuffing it into my pockets, and I was having a good ol' time. However, I got busted, because I was high. I remember I even had a knife that I would have pulled on the men who grabbed me, but I didn't.I remember now, as I write this story, it seems as if I couldn't pull it out, like maybe all this was happening for some intangible reason. So anyways, now we're at my court date. Turns out they are going to put me in jail till I'm 18. They see all the stuff on my record and my pending charge (battery) and decide that I'm better off off the streets. Now 3 years in jail did not sound very tempting to me so I talked with my lawyer (my uncle) about it and he made some sort of deal for me. You see, the trial wasn't for about 3 to 5 months, so in that time period, if I showed improvement, and exceptional behavior, etc., etc., then they would have the charges dropped. So, I decided.knowing I would do something that would screw up the deal if I stayed where I was.to go to a boarding school.

We, my parents and I, visited one after the other but I was never at the least bit satisfied.until we came across a place called the Louisiana Baptist Children's Home. It wasn't exactly a boarding school, but I just knew this is where I was going to be. The Children's Home is more of an orphanage than a boarding school. It's a place of living, not schooling. There are 12 different cottages (that's what the houses are called) that can hold up to 12 kids. To each house there are a couple, they are called the cottage parents. So as you can somewhat imagine, it try to provide a family atmosphere. Now there are kids there who aren't in my kind of situation at all. Some were beaten by their family, deserted, or what not. In fact, each kid probably has their own story unique to themselves. Anyways, back to the story. So, they accept me and they allow me to live their at the Children's Home. One main focus that I would like to present to you now is that once my environment changed.I did not. Although I now wanted to not get in to trouble, and be "good".inside, I guess you can say, I was the same. Now for example.I got into a fight the first day I was there. I also did many other things, well...how about having sex in church? That's pretty messed up, huh? I did that the fourth day I was there. So, there I was, in that Baptist Home, still doing immoral and illegal things (I got some drugs in there too, to explain the illegal). Well, as I said before it was a Baptist Children's Home, so naturally they made us go to church and attend church-related functions. One of those functions is where this story picks up again at.

It was called Youth Impact. It was held in the town's Civic Center, so if you can imagine, it was a pretty big deal and lots of people attended. I, as one might have guessed, sat in the last row with some friends from the Home. We were acting up pretty bad, I almost got kicked out even. We were just being foolish. So, this event thing.there was a Christian worship band, and a speaker. I do not know really how I changed focus from joking around with my friends to what the speaker was saying, but before I knew it his words were the center of my attention. He was speaking about Jesus, about accepting Him in your life, about becoming a new person, about His awesome love. He told us all that anybody who wanted Jesus' love could. And he prayed a pray out loud.which I prayed in my heart. This moment, when I had given Jesus my full attention, believing and deeply desiring His salvation.this moment, short as it was changed me for eternity. Now you see this is the hard part to write about. There are no words that can describe this moment.you must experience yourself to fully understand what I mean. Well, I prayed the prayer, and walked down to that platform where the speaker was, along with a large number of other people who had just experience the same thing I had. They lead me to some guy and he talked to me about what I had just done, I don't remember if I know all that he was trying to explain, or understand it at least, but I do remember that feeling I felt. I felt complete, my search was over.I see now, I was looking for something, and drugs and violence, sex and lies were not it. This thing, this Jesus was what completed me. He ended my search. He made me breathe.truly breathe for the first time. How do you explain that experience? .To breathe for the first time. Well, anyways, I remember that inside me. So, that day I excepted Jesus Christ as my Personal Lord and Savior and He remains in my heart to this day. By the way, since accepting Jesus, I've turned my life right-side up again. I'm very active in my church.Baptist, go figure! I almost have straight A's for my senior year in high school. I've gotten all my charges dropped. My life is so much more wonderful now that Christ lives with me. Not only have I changed my outside world my inner "world" is so much more joyful and peaceful and just awesome.Well, I'm sorry if I don't have that many concrete things that I can write about since I've been saved, other then the friends that I used to hang out with: in jail, have baby, drunks, drug addict, in serious rehab, or dead. So, I think that my success, however perhaps on a little scale, is indeed a great one. And I owe it all to Jesus Christ who loved me before I even knew Him. That is my story.

What is the worse thing you've ever done? I've done many things.I've beaten people, I've robbed houses, I've dealt drugs. But, there is one thing that none of those even compares with.in my opinion. One time, a few years ago, my friend and me went to get high and take a walk. We started talking, and I'm not sure how we started talking about God, but I remember I looked up in the sky with my finger pointed and said f*ck you, you don't exist. I don't need you. That is the worse thing that I've ever done. I cursed Him.He saved me. How much more does He love us then we can even imagine. Whatever you've done in life, don't be afraid to turn to Him. He's just waiting show you how much He loves you. Give him a try. What's it going to hurt?

bbbocaj@yahoo.com

Copyright: Copyright (c) 1996-2005 Michael Fackerell · · Generator: TopicTree 0.8 · Generated: 11 Feb 2012, 02:58 pm AEST · Last modified: 2005-05-22 10:08:02 · 14 ms · The hopes and fears of all the years...