This is very hard for me to write as it forces me to bare my soul. At a young age 13-14 I first experimented with drugs starting with pot and progressing to lsd, presciption pills, speed only a few years ago i ended my use of ecstasy. At the same time i started drugs i started to listening to very heavy metal (satanic) such as Deicide, Morbid Angel etc etc. I have always been an introvert and an intelligent student uptil drugs and seemingly mental illness which is somewhat important i describing what comes next. At the age of 15 after the commencement of my lsd phase i believe i sold my soul. I drew a pentagram with my own blood and said my wish: Psychic powers so that a girl i loved dearly would know how much i loved her. I feel it necessary to add i never asked to influence her love just that she knew, because i was so intrevented and unable to tell her myself as i was constantly stoned at school and very shy of her i did not have the courage.
I completely forgot about that wish very soon after as if i recall correctly i was probably stoned at the time, and evil was not new to me by that stage, drawing pentagrams on walls, writing evil lyrics on desks etc.
At the age of 16-17 I was diagnosed with schizophrenia (a self diagnosis I might add which a doctor confirmed) My life was complete hell thereafter as thats the time i believe my wish came true. This girl left the school not too long after (half way through grade 11) If by some way she did know i believe she would have completely hated me by now and needed to save herself which i completely understand.
I appear to be running out of space or something as the page keeps jumping up and down i will continue with a new post straight after this one.
You need to move, it will be a new begining!
Taking those demons to yourself was sin. Ask God to forgive you and to deliver you
Trust God. He can save the one you love and you, He can gently make her a Christian, and make her holy. Don't fear, trust God who justifies the ungodly. I've prayed for her. Thank God, and thank God for her future faith in Jesus. He doesn't want to condemn, but to save the world through Jesus (John 3:17). Trust God.
Andrew
Thankyou so much for your courage and your friendship for sharing your story with me David. As u know i have been through similar experiences as u have and knowing what u have been through has given me so much strength and understanding of life I feel so blessed to b a part of your spiritual journey, god bless dave, xxKaz
Your post has made me glad! Thank you for sharing what God is revealing to you through His word! To God be the glory!!! How encouraging!
I continue to make mention of you in my prayers, which ever church you decide to fellowship with, I have faith that you will continue to grow in knowledge and wisdom and that God will make clear to you His will. This is what I pray for you! (Which is also my prayer for me!)
God bless you and please continue to share your triumphs (in the Lord), your struggles, your heart with us. I for one am constantly inspired, awed and humbled by such accounts as yours. You have a transparent heart, you have shown that to us all. That takes courage and faith - I am blessed to witness them!
If ever I may pray or be of service in any way, please let me know!
"He must become greater, I must become less"
John 3:30
God is love, I'm so glad to hear the love He's shown you!
Keep following Jesus
You are seeing how good God can be. God wants you to enjoy Him every day. Put a high value on His presence and you will do great!
Newlight, my brother in Christ and co-heir of things to come,
I am pained, seeing your pain. When one member suffers, we all suffer.
Your situation is beyond my wisdom or knowledge but I DO know a couple things:
"Greater is He who is in you, than he who is in the world"
1 John 4:4
You are sent to war with an inferior General in command. Indeed, you are sent into a battle that has ALREADY been won. You have God on your side, that is an awesomely encouraging fact - I think.
Also, here is another truth of which I am certain:
"Submit yourselves then to God, resist the devil and he will flee from you"
James 4:7
It IS possible to overcome, but not on our strength, it seems you know all this. From what you report, you are casting away the sins you know you need to repent of, and the habits therein. I commend you! Continue, my brother, to seek God and pray for wisdom and strength. I too shall pray for you!
Taking advantage of the present which God has blessed us with, I will pray now for you:
Abba Father,
I humbly ask forgiveness for all of my sins - my sin of pride, idolatry, hate, selfishness, greed and many more Lord. Please wash me white as snow and hear my prayer! My brother, Newlight, is under attack. You know better than I Lord, what his needs are and what evils pursue him. I pray Lord that as he seeks you, he finds you. I pray you send your angels to protect him and to guard his heart. Please surround him with your love and bring peace to his spirit. Please give him wisdom in dealing with such powerful forces and guide him through the light which comes from only YOU. Thank you for your love and forgiveness and grace Lord. Not our will but yours be done.
Amen
I will continue to pray brother, please keep us all posted as I for one am concerned for you and take to heart your struggles which now become mine. God bless you.
Neil
My statement,
"You are sent to war with an inferior General in command. Indeed, you are sent into a battle that has ALREADY been won. "
Was SUPPOSED to read, "You are NOT sent to war..."
I apologize for the error. All my entries are conducted via blackberry and often difficult to proof read EVERYTHING correctly. Nevertheless, my apologies!
Neil
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you!
1 Peter 1:3-4
I quoted this passage because of the joy it reflects and how similar that joy rings in my heart!
Thank you for the post! God bless you and Michael, God bless you as well!!! Thank you for allowing God to use you, praise be to Him!
I am happy and my spirit is lifted by this testimony. The love of God truly dwells within the hearts of those on this site and I am encouraged!
Thank you for showing God's love to David, he needs encouragement and you've given him many inspiring Scriptures. Again, thank you. God loves it when people show His love to people who need it.
Dear newlight,
While I am under demonic oppression myself and make no claim to be able to help you, I have prayed for you and I was really sad to hear your story, since you've suffered a lot.
Since I've had experiences with demons, I can tell you have problems with them. They usually enter through openings, and such openings are sins. Try to confess your sins, ask God for forgiveness, deliverance and help, and try not to commit sins. I know it's hard with demons around, but God is much stronger.
Also, you NEED to get born again. Jesus loves you, but you must accept Him. He died for all your sins and rose again so that He could justify you (make you righteous, which means, right with God) (Romans 4:25). Read more about this here http://www.christian-faith.com/forjesus/the-good-news#intro , and pray the prayer and mean it. If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart God raised him from the dead, you shall be saved (Romans 10:14) and whoever calls upon the name of the LORD shall be saved (Romans 10:13). If you pray that prayer with faith, believing God exists and is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him (Hebrews 11:6) you will be saved (born again). And righteousness is a gift from God that comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all sinned and fall short of the glory of God. (Romans 3:22, 23). Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved (Acts16:31)!
Also, check out the teaching on this site about spiritual warfare. It's very useful. And, no, don't call a catholic priest/exorcist because they have sin and catholicism is wrong because they worship statues and images. Delieverance from demons is possible, but you need to trust God. That's what faith is - trusting God, who justifies the ungodly (sinners) and this faith is counted as righteousness (Romans 4:5).
Don't trust demons.
Andrew
David, I hope you prayed the prayer at the end of the link which I posted. Demons don't want you to be saved or delivered, that is why they try to keep you from reading the Gospel or anything that would help you. Pray to Jesus He stops them from doing that, and know that really believing you have the things you pray for at the moment you ask for them, you shall receive!
And all things whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive. (Matthew 21:22)
Don't trust demons, nor give them an opening. Pray to God that He helps you stop sinning. Trust God who justifies the ungodly (Romans 4:5). This is His promise.
Read the spiritual warfare teachings here on this site too, and renounce all satanism and burn all satanic contracts/items once you have prayed for protection and feel safe.
David, in the Scriptures I've not seen God with a female voice, but He reveals Himself as Father, and also Son, and I know God speaks with a male voice, but it's not like an average man since Scripture talks about it. While God can speak to you, be also careful though as many demons masquerade to be God. He loves you, and ask God not to let you blaspheme Him. He will hear your prayer, because if we pray according to His will, He hears us, and blasphemy's not His will. Ask for forgiveness if you haven't, and I'll pray for you aswell. I've prayed for you, and will pray more. God wants to deliver people from demons, He delivered many people in the Bible from them, and He does not change, so trust God for your deliverance. Pray for protection and trust him for protection. The LORD is our Rock and Refuge. Trust God who justifies the ungodly, and you shall be righteous (Romans 4:25). God is slow to anger, and abounding in love. The fear of the LORD in the Bible is shuning evil. God is moving in your life, and God is Good. Praise Him, for all blessings come from him!
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I watched the most dramatic youtube video I have ever seen my friends and it gave me no doubt in jesus and god at all. I prayed to jesus again and said to him: Any doubt I have ever had has been removed, im am sorry i will end that there as I am still in awe of what happened. But I heard the first voice in my head that i can truely believe it was jesus and he said to me: You are saved. Forgive me I am in tears as I write this the pure cool that has gone through my body is still here and has been for several minutes. I am in utter awe of what just happened people, I still need my baptism but i believe my contract has been lifted and I can't control my tears of joy. This is the youtube video post: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_fQZEyqoUc&NR=1
God bless you all faithfull followers of christ
Update: the cool has still not left my body it has been here over 10 minutes now, I just informed my partner of this site and my posts, if anyone wants to pray her and her belief i would be more than greatfull