Jesus called Vini to experience him at the age of 15, and from then Jesus was with her. When she cried out to Jesus in her depressed situation about her studies and future, Jesus consoled her and blessings started to flow into her life.
Dear Brothers and Sisters in Jesus Christ,
This is a testimony that I should have made years before, but I was an ignorant of the importance of a testimony. I sincerely pray and hope that this testimony of mine will reach out and touch each of them personally, thereby making them accept Jesus as the One and Only in their Life.
I am a 23-Year-old Girl from South India. I was born into a Christian family who were regular churchgoers. My parents always taught me the Word of God and admonished me on a day-to-day basis that I need to accept him as the Light of my life. Though I did make a promise to make Jesus mine, never did I take pains to invoke Him. But He loved me…and thanks to Him, He did create and opportunity to get me to know Him better.
I did my studies in a Christian school. And while I was in the 10th, my School Principal invited us for a Retreat in Kerala, my homeland. It was the month of September 1995. Being a Christian I was ready and of course my parents did not object in any way and I joined the team. The retreat was to take place in the Divine Retreat Centre, Muringoor. I was all eager not that I was going to see Jesus, but about the fact that we were going on a picnic to Kerala. Little did I realize that “Jesus had called me”.
We reached the place safe and sound. Now this place has retreats in many languages English, Tamil, Malayalam, Konkani, Hindi and Telugu. All my friends sat for the English retreat, But something, someone was egging me on to go for the Malayalam retreat, which means I would be all alone. But thank God, One of my school attendants, an elderly woman with her daughter joined me. Thank you Jesus, Praise you Jesus…It was He who did that to make sure that I gave Him all the attention. Had I been with my friends, I would have never had time to pray.
The retreat started. And I realized that I was moving Closer to Jesus for I could feel His Presence. I started praying…and crying. Though I was just 15 years, I was crying, in fact weeping buckets. At first I was feeling uncomfortable, but then the strong realization came upon me that I was crying in front of my Father, my Jesus who died for me. He listens to my sighs, my cries. Only He can understand and sympathize with me. He understands the pain, nobody will. So I gave up myself to him. I cried every time there was the adoration. Then came the day for Confession. I confessed all my sins and to my surprise, I was weeping there also. Jesus deserved my tears. Trust me friends, It was the best confession that I had ever made.
After the confession, I started feeling light. He had taken away my sins and made me white as snow.
On Thursday during the time of praise and worship, Jesus was kind enough to show me a vision. And this is what I saw…I was clad in a brown frock and carrying a cross. The cross was very heavy and I was finding it very difficult to move ahead. Then I saw Jesus. He was tall and wearing a white robe with a red shawl about his shoulders and chest. He kept walking on without even bothering to turn back, when I was struggling to move ahead. Walking further on we came to a series of steps. The sky was the background here. Jesus started climbing the steps and I followed him. So heavy was the cross that I slipped and fell headlong. Dear friends, Jesus came running down (but I was not able to see His face-I was and am too big a sinner for it) picked me up, dusted my knees and my frock and comforted me while doing this.
So friends what do I make of this…at first I was confused and skeptical about what I saw…but this was His way for showing me that there was big time trouble waiting for me and that He would be with me through out. Please do read on…only then will things fall into places.
On the Saturday of that week, I took the train back to Chennai, back to the world of chaos and troubles. I went home a new person so full of the love of Jesus.
Looking into my family, we were a middle class family and my father was the sole breadwinner. He was an employee with a manufacturing company and with the salary he did mange to make both ends meet. He made sure that both my brother and me were educated in the best school.
It so happened that the company closed down (due to labour and management problems) as soon as I finished with my 12th standard. My father went into a depression not knowing how to run a family. We owned a flat where we stayed and decided to go in for an alternative arrangement, which would promise a continual flow of income in my family. We shifted over to a smaller flat and rented out our apartment. We started thriving on the rent. The was the kind of a life we led.
I was a good student and my percentage was an 86% in the 12th Std, with a 92%in Physics and 89% in Biology. My father was determined that I go for higher studies. It was my dream to pursue a career in biology and therefore I rejected all the offers I got in various other disciplines to go for a degree in microbiology. This was in a college close to my home…but they ran the college for profit and therefore demanded 20,000 Rs( in Indian currency-this was just the donation amount), as a capitation fee, in spite of the fact that I had a good percentage. I was a fool completely blinded by the urge to grow into a respectable person in the society and …my parents agreed to go ahead…and borrowed Rs 20,000 for my sake. I took a vow that I will study hard and get a good job. But God had other plans for me…this college was a rotten one…this microbiology department had not faculties in it.
The college authorities were not ready to do anything for the benefit of the students, faculties left and the services offered by the college was very bad. The only glimmer of hope I began to see when I joined the college was no more there…Dear friends, the guilty feeling that I carried with me was so strong that I put my heart and soul into what I was doing. But things did not seem to work out any better. I suddenly realized that my degree in this college was not going to fetch me anything. I suddenly wanted to leave the college. I had joined in the month of June and by August I was not able to put up with the college.
Dear friends, can you please imagine as to what kind of a mental frame of mind I was in. All my dreams were blown to smithereens. One side it was the feeling of guilt that was gnawing into to me…because my father who was penniless had already spent about 30,000 (all borrowed money) on my education. My brother was still studying. The poor boy had to go without many things fo
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