Which Way Lord? - Chapter 3 - Dr Chandrakumar
God’s Will In Marriage
“Brother, how can I find God's will in choosing my wife/my husband?” is a very pertinent question. Today, there are thousands of broken marriages, as much importance has not been given to this question.
Once when I was ministering to young people in Singapore, a young girl came and asked me, “Brother, I have already fallen in love with a young boy, now how can I find God's will?” My immediate answer was, “You have fallen? Get up! Why did you fall?” In Christian marriage there is no such thing as “falling in love.” It has only the concept of “entering into a love relationship” in marriage to a man or a woman chosen by God. The Bible only says, “Husbands love your wives…” (Eph. 5:25), and not “Boys love your girlfriends” or vice versa.
It is true that love is needed even to choose the life partner. But what kind of a love should it be? It should be a pure, mature love from God for our future marriage partner and it should be out of respect for the partner's devotion and commitment to Christ. This love should not be mixed with emotions of the flesh. It is a two-way process and both partners should experience this kind of love and be equally guided by the Lord towards each other.
We must be extremely careful in choosing our life partner. If we carefully follow some of the principles of finding God's will, with much fasting and prayer, in an unreserved, unconditional openness, then the Lord will definitely give us the right partner and his best choice. These principles are given in my book: “Which way Lord?”
As I was a gifted young man, more parents were after me than eligible women. But I was extremely strict and careful in this area of my life. Though I was broad minded and lived in a cosmopolitan, sophisticated society, I always endeavoured to maintain a distance from young women. I talked with them freely but kept myself far away from any emotional involvement with anyone. But I had already started praying that the Lord would show me the right person, at the right time, preferably through some other mature believers in Christ. According to Jeremiah 29:11, I believed that God had a plan and purpose in my life, to give me a hope and future and that he had already chosen the best person for me. Hence my prayer was, “Lord show me that person.”
At last, the day arrived when the Lord revealed my life partner to me in a prayer conference. A mature, senior sister in the Lord (Mrs. Christine Jeyachandran) who had been very much concerned and praying for me, approached me and said that the Lord was showing her a girl in that conference who would be the right person for me. Then I started praying about it and that evening the Lord gave me an opportunity to listen to this girl’s testimony. It was almost the same testimony as mine. She had the same kind of vision and commitment, burden for lost souls, and had already been involved in ministry among students and children, just like myself. I also shared my testimony with her.
That night, I spent a long time on my knees, asking the Lord to clearly show me whether she was his best choice for me. With great openness, I asked the Lord to either say “Yes” or “No”, as He already knew the answer. In the quietness of that night, I could hear a still clear voice saying, “Yes”
to me and at the same tim
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Thank you
Am so glad that I have found what I have been looking for, though I feel I have come across this a bit late I mean am already seriously involved with someone and there are times when I doubt if really this is the person am suppossed to be with. Brethrens in Christ what can do in this situation? I have been praying about it but God has not said anything.
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