Chapter 4
God's View Of Marriage
Marriage is a divine institution established by God for our good. Yet, we find it to be a most puzzling phenomenon. On one hand, there are multitudes that cannot wait to get into marriage, while on the other hand, there are many who desperately want to get out of it.
One of the most intimate and difficult of all human relationships is that of marriage. It can be the most gratifying and fulfilling of all relationships but at the same time it can also be one of the most frustrating. It is not to be leapt into, but entered with steps of solemn deliberation. Marriage is the rock on which the family is built. The family, in turn, provides the rock on which society rests its foundation.
Socrates told his students, “By all means marry. If you get a good wife, it is well and good; you would be a blessed man. But if you get a bad wife, don't worry - You will become a philosopher.” The only real way to understand God's view of marriage is to look back into the first marriage as recorded in the Bible. We understand from Genesis 2:18-24 that marriage was desired and designed by God.
i) Marriage is Desired by God
a) For Human Pleasure
God saw all that he had made, and behold, ‘It was very good.’ But concerning only one thing, he said ‘It was not good.’ Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him.” (Gen. 1:31; 2:18). Actually Adam was not really alone. There were many animals and living creatures, but he could not have a soul-satisfying communion with them. “... But for Adam there was not found a helper suitable for him.” (Gen. 2: 20).
The word ‘helper’ or ‘helpmate’ is derived from two Hebrew words meaning ‘a help’ and ‘agreeing to him.’ Woman was created to be a helper suitable for man, compatible with him-spiritually, mentally, emotionally, and physically. She is his complement, providing what he lacks and fulfilling his potential.
She is a part of him. In fact, she has a part of him, and man is incomplete until he gets that part back in the person of a wife. Does this mean that singleness is wrong? No, but singleness can only be practiced when a person has the divinely bestowed gift of celibacy. The Bible teaches that celibacy is a special gift from God that is sometimes bestowed on a man or a woman, when the single status would permit him or her to be more effective in the service of Jesus Christ (Matt. 19:11, 12).
So, a woman is a part of man and has a part of him. We must take note as to which part of man God used to make her. He took a rib out of Adam and made the beautiful Madame. St. Augustine wrote, “If God had meant woman to rule over man, he would have taken her out of Adam's head. If he had designed her to be man’s slave, he would have taken her out of his feet. But God took woman out of man's side, for he made her to be a helpmeet and an equal to him.” A man's wife is his partner, not his property.
b) For
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