I attend church everytime the doors are opened. I counsel at a drug alcohol live in group 2 x a month. I attend bible studay every week aside from church.I am always surrounded by good christian friends, my best friend is my deacon. I fast;yet I tell my friends I am not as spiritual as they are.I feel at times i am playing church. I do Love the Lord with all my heart. I am seeking his guideance. I know he has forgiven my past, maybe I haven't.There is so much I am trying to learn. I grew up in a baptist church (independent, fundamental) I now attend a methodist , we joke sometimes and call it a methocostical, we just praise worship and taught about one GOD ; the trinity.. my problem sometimes is have i already grieved the Holy Spirit as he is no longer with me? Thanks for any help