you need to have that one on one time with God and listen very carefully to his voice. i tell you what i am during the same thing by listeing, praying and just letting the Lore direct my life. believe and trust that he is with you. when time like this get hard know that God is by your side through every thing.Deuteronomy 55:22 The Lord is the one who goes ahead of you, he will never leave you or forsake you , so don't fear or be dismayed amen.