I am going through divorce, was evicted from the home by my husband. He had several extra marital affairs. I know i sinned regarding finances when i was fed up, cornernd and a lot of other situations which were not excuses, and which I confessed. But with him i had to keep on going to everybody and tell what i did while he did not have to . He did not have to tell everybody that he beat me up, the fact that i also worked meant nothing, the fact that he abused alchohol meant nothing, his collection of traffic fines and spending at will so that i had to try and make ends meet, and thus my mess with the finances. he told me that he wanted to see me in a position where i had nothing, and i am there, he told me to go and live with my parents until even they did not even want me any more, and i am there, even my sister has physically abused me like he did. when I was small my cupboard was untidy and my mother spit at me and told me i was worse that a "kaffir". She told me that with all the love in her heart she wished me an unhappy marriage, out of which i was chased after 28 years. She even told me that i would be fat like my father's mother who she hated. At this stage I want to commit suicide, but then satan would have a field day. why must some keep on apologising, crawling, and keep on being beaten up in all possible manners.