Retirement was a big adjustment I had to make when I quit working and moved to a high rise. I never dreamed I would be back in my old home town again. The high rise was situated along the river with a beautiful park across the street from the building. I spent many hours sitting on a bench meditating and wondering how I would spend my time. When I got tired of that I walked up and down the street where I took in the beauty of the river scene.

There is no transportation to be able to go shopping or visiting anyone. There used to be a good bus service and trains I could ride but that all disappeared. If you didn’t have a car you were stuck. While I worked, I lived in an area with good bus service. There were stores near by to supply my needs.

I had a hard time getting acquainted with the other residents. I had nothing in common with them. I sat in my apartment for almost six years except when I had to get out. I didn’t join in any of the activities. After working so many years as a waitress, I decided I needed a rest. All day I sat and watched my favorite videos, mostly musicals and “Pride and Prejudice”. While I did this I got “hooked” on making plastic canvas items. I gave most of them away. Thenanother site. I got into making crocheted Afghans.

God took advantage of the situation. Now He got me where He wanted me. I never sat still long enough to listen for His voice. The movies got boring. I just turned them on for the noise. I went into a depression filled with guilt and remorse for the stupid, dangerous and sinful things I had done. I pushed God out of my life. I realized it was God chastising me before He could get me to admit where I had gone wrong. While I was still working, I wrote 7 series of Mini-Sermons---from 1986-1987. I passed out 100 copies a week. I tried to pass them out at the high rise but only a few would take them. After one lady read them, she said she was moving to Colorado. She would get her daughter to put them on the web. That was something new to me. I did have a computer before but I wasn’t on the internet. It sounded too complicated for me.

She wasn’t in Colorado very long when we got the news that she died. She had put the idea into my head that it was what God wanted me to do and it stuck there. It haunted me day and night. I told people I was going to do it. They laughed at my boldness for even thinking that was God’s will for me. I didn’t have enough money to buy a computer or connect to the internet. It was impossible.

I was told it cost a lot of money to have a web site. I didn’t even know what it entailed. The thought wouldn’t let go. I got tested when my daughter told me about a computer a woman wanted to give away. She was going to Colorado and wanted my daughter to leave her husband and children and go with her. Of course she refused. The woman was still going to let me have the computer. I refused her offer. I had the feeling she was part of a cult. By accepting the gift I would be condoning her actions.

In 2001 I got a letter from my life insurance company. They were opening to the public a chance to buy stock in the company. They didn’t have to buy insurance with them. I was shocked when they also told me I had a certain amount of stock and they were sending me a check for that much. God didn’t let me be aware that I had stock. He knew I would blow it if I cashed it in sooner. It was the exact amount I needed to buy a Gateway Computer and printer. That is just like God to do what you may think is impossible.

It took me about a month to learn to halfway use the machine. I surfed the web to see what I could find on it. I looked for Christian sites. I was pleased to learn that they accepted writings from their readers. If accepted the items would be published. I didn’t have to have my own site and this didn’t cost a cent! I wouldn’t know how to use it anyway. My mind was technically illiterate.

The first place I found was *******. They made me their featured author for a short time and didn’t accept any more. “A featured writer, Me?’ I was always a background type of person. No one ever seemed to notice I was there. I was always ignored.

There is only one thing wrong with the site. A professional journalist

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