I can answer one of your questions and that is how do I ask God to show His love for me....He already has....This is one of my favorite verses Romans 5:8 God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us....How do you know His instructions? For me if it does not line up with the Word of God (Holy Bible), then the thought is either my own natural mind or the devil's influence...When it comes to doing something that God wants me to do but I am not sure if it is God or myself, I will have a constant urging to do it until I do it and the action God wants me to do will never lead me to do something sinful...When it comes to showing your love for God it is through obedience...Saying NO to temptation and YES to Him...