Welcome,
All Alone
Thu, 10/27/2011 - 00:51
Hello everyone. I wonder if anyone actually reads my posts. However, here I am again in my apartment all alone. I feel so sad and alone. I have prayed and prayed. Now I feel weak like I shouldn't pray which I believe is another trick of the devil. I feel like now I am having panic attacks. That no one cares about me at all. That this is all non-sense. I can't commit to anything. I have no real friends. No one calls me anymore unless by accident. Which just happened. One of my friends was calling and I got excited I thought that wow their calling me. When I picked up they said oh did my phone call you. Sorry didn't mean to. I was trying to get my MP3 player. I gotta go and hung up. I feel so empty at night. Like I should just disappear. I pray and I wonder does God even answer my prayers for my husband? So many times I have turned to the Lord. However, these thoughts keep coming into my head and their getting stronger and stronger. I wonder am I losing my mind? It's getting harder and harder to keep fighting on the battlefield of the mind. I don't really have anyone I can trust to talk about this stuff with. There's also no churches close by that I can attend. I am so lonely. Why is this happening to me. I am a good person. Loving and Kind. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know where to turn. Should I just quit praying? Will the devil leave me alone then? I doubt it. I need strength and keep praying and praying and I even pray in tongues. I am trying to stand on the word of God. We have authority over Satan it says so in the bible. I wanna make God happy. I just keep feeling so worthless. I miss my husband. I believe he is going to come back someday. However, when. I don't understand it's like he fell off the face of the earth. Like he never excisted except in my dreams. He doesn't call me doesn't talk to me. I don't even know where he is. Except I love him. I forgive him for all he's done. I am a very forgiving person. I want my life back. I want it all back. Everything seemed to be going great untill I started studying with the Jehovahs witnesses. Now I am scared alone and sad. During the day I feel stronger. But at night I can't sleep. Then when I can't I feel like I am being tormented with panic with my thoughts. I am going to have to go to the dr for help I think. Please if anyone out there reads this pray for me. I don't know what to do. I hope that God is real. I can't believe this earlier today I was all fired up. I was reading the bible and confessing the word. Then now I am sitting here a lone crying and feel absolutely wretched. Why is this happening to me. How can I make it stop? I am going now to pray. Please pray for me, please.
Sun, 10/30/2011 - 00:28
#2
Never Alone
We are never alone,Jesus said he will be closer than a brother,and he would go with us to the end of the world. Just think, because he was willing to spend 33 years with mankind trying every way to help us,when he didn't have to. Plus,you have brothers and sisters all over the world because of his love for you and I and all of us. I read of some bad days,and they hit all of us hard at times,but if we give something as little as a glass of water in the name of Jesus he rewards us,wow, Alone,nay,blessed and after every rain there is a rainbow. Tomorrow when you awake,just thank God for your great family God has gave you,rearange the furniture,brighten up the house,change everything and start a new life on a new day,Tell satan's dart throwing little punks .get thee behind me,and get out the phone book,locate a holiness church,tell them send over a ride and have a glorious time in Lord with the family of God,your kinsmen in CHRIST! and take 2 blessings and thank Jesus in the morning,Sister,God bless and he will.amen
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Its really tough to be forsaken by the one you love. I am praying God give you new hope and new joy and satisfaction in His presence and that your husband will return to you also. But before that happens, make God your source of life. Don't put off happiness and joy until that day.