After searching for a job for nearly 5 months, last week I finally found one as a cafe assistant. I went in for the trial last week Wednesday and everything went well and I got the job. Then I went in again on Thursday and Friday for a few hours. Monday was my actual starting date, it was busy but I managed. There was so much to learn, and the pressure was on. On Tuesday, we had another busy day and I made a mistake as I was taking the coffee orders so instead of writing soy flat white I wrote flat white. My manager was so mad at me and didn’t speak to me much for the rest of the day. She then went and told the Chef that she hated me and I felt so hurt. I mean apart from the mistake i made I didn’t know what else I had done wrong to upset her to the extend of hating me. I wanted to confront her about it but I decided not to since it was almost home time I thought i would just cry and pray about it. Let me just say this since I started this job, something didn’t feel right. I felt like I wasn’t meant to be there, but this didn’t not affect my performance. I worked really hard and gave it my all. However, I prayed about this I asked God if he had placed me there and I asked him for a confirmation. And yesterday I found out that my manager hates me and I was confused. I thought of quiting because I didn’t see any way I was going to work with her knowing that she hates me. I prayed about it and I asked God to instruct and advise me in the way I should go. Then I decided that I was going to talk to her and find out why she felt that way towards me.
This morning I arrived at work with a smile on my face (half genuine and half fake). I asked her if we could talk when we were not busy and she agreed. Then about 10:30, she called me for the chat. Firstly, I apologized for the coffee mistake then I let her know that I knew about how she felt towards me and I asked her the reason being. She didn’t deny it, in fact she went on to say that she hated me because I am not friendly with the customers and that I lack a sense of urgency. I told her that i didn’t think it was a good enough reason to hate someone. I then explained to her that i had only been in the job for five minutes and I was still learning everything but she didn’t understand so she asked me to leave immediately. I couldn’t believe it, I said my goodbyes and I left in tears.
I don’t know if all this happened because I was not meant to be there in the first place or maybe I handled things the wrong way. Is this the sign from God that the job wasn’t for me or should i have begged her not to let me go? I honestly think that I gave this job my best and worked really hard, I thought I was doing very well-I interacted well with the customers and provided good service and had no complaints. I recently completed a degree in Psychology and I haven’t been able to obtain a job in this field so I started applying for anything. I am just wondering if i would ever be good enough for any job. I know God is in control and that he knows the plans he has for me but waiting is excruciating.
Please pray for me that I find a job with a meaning. I need strength, courage, patience and hope.