Carol Dore was an addict of drugs and alcohol. One day her daughter called the police to take her away because of the trouble that she made. They took her to the local psychiatric unit and that became the turning point in her life.
For years i lived in sin. I drank alcohol every night. Occasionally i did cocaine or meth. I worked in night clubs for years. I married for the third time and 2 years later quit the club life but continued to drink. My children went through puberty and became extremely rebellious.My husband and i fault continuously. At night i reached for a quart of beer and drowned all my sorrows Things got worse.The beer started to make me even more depressed than i was before drank it. I felt like i was in a dark depressing whirlwind.I would sit outside at night ad pray crying out for help. This went on for close to a year.Finally, one night i cried out to God in desperation, Lord whatever it takes take away my desire to drink. Or let me die tonight in my sleep.
The next day i was even worse . I drank to six packs of beer. My kids were fighting. I went outside to get away. My daughter came outside and started hollering at me. I told her i couldn’t take it any more. What did she want me to do? Kill myself. Than i came inside i grabbed a bottle of pills. I poured a handful and went to take them.Something stopped me. I took a few and through the rest to the ground.
My daughter called 911. I was infuriated .When they got here i refused to go with them. Non-the less they took me anyway. After i was released from the hospital. They took me over to the local psychiatric unit. I was there for 24 hours. Locked up in the back with people who were in there for a very long time. I saw allot of things as i sat on a cold bench the only furniture except an overhead tv and the nurses desk. One woman followed the nurses around begging for a beer.A teenage girl was walking around i spoke to her she seemed perfectly normal. I wondered why she was in the back locked up. Within the hour i found out why. She started to suddenly scream. 6 nurses ran and grabbed her. She thrashed about wildly. Shouting Lucifer, Lucifer. And other demonic things. They tired her to her bed. It was like a scene out of the exorcist.
Their were people who had , had nervous break-downs. People just staring into space. It was terrible. People who had gone over the edge because of Alcohol or drugs. The nurses seemed cold as ice.
I just sat there and watched. It was almost like i was watching a horrible movie, About how humans can end up if they have no hope,no faith They just go right over the edge. .
God was present there. When we went to lunch.i saw a woman with a hand attached to her shoulder(No Arms) Gently guide another woman with her hand to the lunchroom. She was so kind and so compassionate toward this woman. When she must have herself endured much ridicule in her life.I will never forget her.
I left not long afterwards and returned home. I thank God for the experience i had that evening. Praise the Lord.The urge to drink had vanished.
That was 8 years ago. My other problems didn’t vanish overnight. But the lord has been here to guide me all along.At times i have started to stray from the right path but the lord has always gently guided me back. With the same love and compassion i saw in the woman at the hospital.
The first couple years after that were the hardest. Several times i felt as though i had so many burdens that i literally could feel the weight of the cross on my back. I would tell m husband i had to be alone not to disturb me for anything. I would go sit in the woods and pray. Each tie a miracle would occur.
I will tell you about the first one. That afternoon my burdens were extremely heavy i could barely, breath i felt as though i was being pushed to the ground A cross was on my back that i could carry no longer. I grabbed a blanket and a book I went and sat in the woods behind my house. I started to read but i couldn’t . I laid the book down. Tears streamed down my face. I started praying and poured my heart out to God. Than i just sat there. My mind was blank. Finally quiet. All anxiety was gone.Than I was shown a most beautiful sign from God.A beautiful bird flew down it landed on a low hanging branch right in front of me. It was looking at me,singing the most beautiful birdsong. The bird was so close if i l had lifted my arm up i could have touched it. I couldn’t believe it. Than another bird ,just like the first flew down.It landed next to the first and looked at me and begun to sing. Than a third bird.landed next to the second looked at me and it also began to sing. A few minutes later they flew off. I got up with a light heart and walked towards the house. Praise the lord!He is always with me.